


wasted on you

by torkz



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Dibs Flip, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Recreational Drug Use, Roommates, Slow Burn, samwell men’s hockey team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-02-08 07:50:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 20,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12860088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torkz/pseuds/torkz
Summary: Derek Nurse thinks that if he never falls in love with another redheaded asshole named William, it’ll be too soon.





	1. Chapter 1

Sometimes Derek Nurse wonders if he has some cloud around him that repels red headed assholes with the first name William. It’s really the only explanation he can think of for why one William Poindexter is on his knees with his head in his hands, like sharing Nursey’s space is the worst thing that could've happened to him. Derek has a lot of feelings about that, but Chowder is leaping his excitement into the air and he thinks catching him is far more important than starting an argument that he knows will hurt later.

A smile is on his face and his arms are up and before he knows it, they’re full of Chris Chow.

“I’m so excited to have you both here! You spend so much of your time here anyway Nursey, and I know you hated your dorm and your RA and your roommate, and you’ll be right next door! You too Dex, I know it’ll save you a lot of money to be in the Hau— wait. What’s wrong?”

Chowder climbs out of Nursey’s arms and Nursey looks at the ground before he gets the full force of Goalie Face. The room is silent, Nursey stuffing his hands in his pockets, Dex still positioned on the floor. Chowder doesn’t fill the room either, standing stoic while he waits for someone to speak up.

“It’s chill. Poindexter doesn’t want to be my roommate so maybe next year, C. Come on, let's see what Bitty is cooking.” Nursey says and grabs Chowder’s arm to drag him out of the room.

Chowder looks back like he wants to say something, but Dex doesn’t react and Nursey keeps moving. He feels numb now, only focused on how much he does not want to watch Chowder chew Dex out. He chances a glance at Chowder and he looks thunderous, so Nursey changes course to head for the Reading Room instead. He pushes Chowder out of the window and follows, sitting down with his legs crossed when he gets to a comfortable spot.

Nursey tells him what happened, about how Dex came in feeling entitled to the space, how Lardo and Bitty decided on the coin flip, how the coin landed on it’s side. Chowder seems to get increasingly agitated as the story goes on; he paces, making aborted movements to the window like he wants to crawl back through.

“He didn’t deserve that room anymore than you did!” Chowder says.

“Nope,” Nursey replies.

“If anything, you deserved it more because dibs are about the owner of the room, not the Haus as a whole!”

“Sure.”

“And if nothing else, pressuring Lardo for it because he knows how to twist a knob on the back of the fucking dryer doesn’t entitle him to a damn thing! He should have been disqualified or something.”

“Wow, Chow, tell me how you really feel.”

“Why aren’t you more angry?!” Chowder exclaims, frustration and annoyance swirling through his voice.

“Because my feelings are hurt,” Nursey tries not to snap.

Chowder softens immediately and sits down pressed right up against Nursey. They don’t speak for a bit, for which Nursey is grateful. Chowder heaves a big breath and lays his head on Nursey’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry for yelling,” he says, and Nursey laughs.

“It’s okay bro, I know you weren’t yelling at me.” He pauses for a minute and Chowder lets him, sitting quietly.

“I’m not going to stay where I’m not wanted, C. I think I’m going to find somewhere else to live,” Nursey says softly, and Chowder huffs out a frustrated breath.

“I don't give a damn about what Dex wants. I want you here. Bitty wants you here. I’ll talk to Dex and tell him to get his shit together. Don’t make other arrangements yet, okay?” Chowder asks.

Nursey is hesitant but Chowder has mastered the art of getting what he wants or needs out of his team, and Nursey caves before he can think too long about it. He nods and Chowder grins, pulling him into a hug and patting his back.

“Come on, let’s go down to the kitchen, I’m sure Bitty really is cooking something.” Chowder says, and pulls Nursey to his feet.

Nursey can feel him walking behind him, a barrier in the event that he trips. He won’t say it but it eases the ache of rejection a little to know that there’s someone on the team who cares that much.

He follows Chowder downstairs to find Bitty in the kitchen smiling at his phone as the smell of some sort of pastry wafts out of the oven. He looks up as they walk in, his soft smile morphing into a confused frown as he looks at Chowder’s expression.

“What did I miss?” He asks, sitting his phone down to give them his full attention.

“I mean nothing, since you were there when it happened,” Chowder says. “But if you’re wondering why I’m annoyed it’s because Dex was allowed to act like an asshole and Nursey was left to pretend that it wasn’t rude as hell.”

“Hey, now, I’m not that boy’s daddy. He was an asshole before I ever talked to him, and it’s not on me if he hasn’t changed,” Bitty snaps back, accent thickening just a little as he gets defensive.

“I’m not saying that you’re responsible for how he acts, I’m saying it’s not cool to ignore Nursey’s feelings in all of this. You guys treated the whole thing like Dex was fair in his attitude. Nursey deserved your support.”

“C, chill.” Nursey cuts in before Bitty can respond. “I didn’t drag you away from Dex so you could yell at Bitty. That’s not fair.”

Chowder crosses his arms and glares at Nursey. “Let me stand up for you, since apparently no one else will.”

“I don’t need you to. I appreciate it, but it’s okay.” Nursey says, smiling despite the tense situation.

“He is right, though, even if he was an ass about it,” Bitty huffs. He comes around the table and pulls Nursey into a hug. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think about it that way.”

“Yeah, well.” Nursey says, patting Bitty’s back. He’s a little uncomfortable with all the attention on him, but he is appreciative of Bitty’s apology.

“Where is he, anyway?” Bitty asks.

“Still upstairs, on his knees in Lardo’s room.” Chowder answers, disgusted once more.

“Oh, Jesus Christ on a cracker, he’s so dramatic.” Bitty rolls his eyes. “Let me finish this pie and I’ll go talk to him.”

“It’s fine, you don’t have to talk to him. I don’t want him pressured into living with me. I’m a big boy, I’ll be okay. What kind of pie are you making?” Nursey says.

Bitty looks at him with suspicion in his eyes, but takes the distraction for what it is. He goes off talking about the recipe he was wanting to try before he films it for his channel, describing the use of lime juice instead of lemon to add a different type of tang to the dish. Nursey can still feel Chowder’s eyes on him, but he watches Bitty like the different properties of citrus are the most interesting thing he’s ever heard in his life. He’s appreciative of Chowder’s concern, but he’s gonna save the drama for later this evening when he can cry about it in peace.

Because Chowder doesn’t know how stupidly in love with William Poindexter Nursey is, and he plans to keep that to himself for a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first big fic for Nurseydex, I’m excited and terrified. Thanks to all of my friends for encouraging me an a special thanks to Nan for being the lovely beta she always is!  
> Please leave me a comment, and visit me on [tumblr!](https://oluranurse.tumblr.com)


	2. Chapter 2

When Nursey trudges into his dorm room a few hours later, he thanks whatever gods are listening that his roommate isn’t around. He’s ordered his favorite dish from the Indian restaurant down the street to arrive in a few minutes, and he sets about changing into something comfortable. He plans to cuddle up in bed and see if his big sister is home, hoping she’ll be around for a video call.

Fatimah has this way about her that has always brought him endless comfort, never demanding more of him than he’s willing to give, always patiently waiting for him and offering her own insight when he needs it. She’s been that way his whole life, even when he was ten and annoying her with playground talk and she was twenty two and wading her way through college. He finds that talking to her is like getting a fresh dose of home, in a way that talking to his parents never seems to be.

He didn’t think Dex’s dramatic dismissal had such an effect on him, but as he texts Fatimah, he realizes that he’s dissociated his way through most of his self care practices. He gets his call for postmates as he waits for his sister to get back to him, and she calls him right when he gets back in his dorm and settles in with his food. He answers on his laptop and it feels like breathing for the first time when he sees her face.

She’s in her kitchen and he can see tools for dinner, various vegetables and spices lined up neatly on the counter in front of her. She must have the laptop on the other side of the kitchen, so that she can keep working. Her long curly black hair is pulled up high in a messy bun, and she’s dressed comfortably in a pair of grey joggers and a black crop top. She dimples at him and waves happily, frowning quickly at the look on his face.

“Wanna talk about it, Baby?” She always asks, never assumes, and it’s his favorite thing about her.

“Nah, I’m gonna eat. You just keep cooking. You can tell me about work or just do whatever you were doing before.”

“Okay. I’m trying out this pad thai recipe I found from this cute chef on YouTube. I’m trying to figure out how to make the recipe enough for three people.”

“Probably just triple all the measurements, Sis.” Nursey says around a mouth of curry, chuckling when Fatimah rolls her eyes.

“Well, yeah, I just don’t want to fuck it up. You know I’m not very good at winging it when it comes to cooking.”

“Worst case scenario, you can call Kim.” Nursey answers, referring to Fatimah’s girlfriend who studied culinary for a while before settling on veterinary school. She has a natural affinity for cooking, especially various Asian cuisine, as she’s able to pull from her familiarity with the Korean dishes she’s eaten her whole life.

“No, she’s gonna be home soon anyway, and I’m trying to surprise her and Arin. I’m never home to cook, what with my long hours at the hospital, so I wanted to do something nice.”

“Wow, how sweet of you, Fats. It’s nice of you to do something to thank them for dealing with you,” Nursey chirps.

“Oh, fuck you,” she laughs as she chops up some veggies. “I’m a goddamn delight. You called me, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, yeah, I guess you’re alright.”

Fatimah rolls her eyes and Nursey eats his food slowly. They sit in silence for a while, content in the sound of Fatimah’s knife carefully chopping and her soft humming. He speaks up when he watches her refer to her recipe before throwing some liquids in a small bowl to make her sauce.

“So, they gave out dibs today.”

“Yeah? How did that go?”

“Ransom and Holster gave their room to Ollie and Wicks.”

“Oh,” Fatimah says, taken aback. “Weren’t you kind of anticipating getting that room with Dex?”

“Yup. So that left Lardo’s room as the only room really available.”

“I’m assuming that she gave it to you, you’ve been editing her papers and shit all year.”

“Well. Dex felt like he deserved it for fixing shit all around the house or whatever, so he kind of fought about it?” Nursey says, and tells Fatimah how it all went down.

She huffs in annoyance on his behalf at Dex’s behavior and clucks in approval at Chowder getting all pissy for him. She’s quiet when he’s done, temporarily dumping out the meat she was browning onto a plate and dumping some veggies into her wok.

“Baby. You deserved better than that.” Fatimah says softly, and just like that Nursey is crying.

His siblings are the only ones who know his feelings for Dex. He confessed one evening to her and Amina on Facetime while he was smoking a blunt in the Reading Room, and they told him that they already knew and pretended not to see him cry. Fatimah tells him over and over that it's worth it to date other people, even though she knows that he won’t bother to try. She has always listened quietly when he talks about the stupid crease Dex gets between his eyebrows when he’s coding, and the way his snark makes Nursey want to kiss him and punch him at the same time, offering no judgement or criticism.

She’s never told him before that he deserved better, despite thinking it, and it makes Nursey feel like shit to know that he’s still going to be in love with such a shitty guy at the end of all of this. It hurts more that Fatimah knows it too, that he’s probably disappointing her.

He sniffles quietly and watches through lingering tears as Fatimah adds her meat into the newly sauced noodles in the wok. The sound of sizzling feels good in his brain and it helps ease him down from his cry. He wipes his eyes and nose on his sleeve and Fatimah scrunches her face up in disgust. It startles a laugh out of him and replaces the ache in his heart with a different one that only comes from missing his sister.

“I’m sorry,” he says, and she scoffs.

“Don’t apologize for feeling something. I worked too hard to make sure you share your shit with me for you to be apologizing for it, B,” she responds.

He makes a noise of acknowledgment in his throat and watches as she slides her food onto a dish, alongside the garnishes she chopped up. He hears the beeps signaling her front door opening and he wonders for the millionth time how she always manages to time everything so perfectly.

“What do I do?” he asks her, feeling much younger than his twenty years.

“You live in that room. You won it fair and square, if he has a problem with it, he can leave. And you don't go easy on him. I don't care what his reasons are for it, until he can apologize to you, you don’t have anything to say to each other,” she says fiercely.

Nursey hears soft footsteps and watches his sister smile when she hears Kim’s voice coming closer to the kitchen. Kim steps in and stands on her tiptoes to kiss her softly, and Nursey lets himself bask in this little piece of joy his sister has found.

Kim finally notices him and grins, waving happily at the camera.

“Derek! When are you gonna come down and visit us?” she asks.

“School is about to let out, maybe the beginning of the summer?” Derek says, hoping she doesn’t notice his red rimmed eyes.

“What? You wanna come visit? Why didn’t you say something earlier?” Fatimah exclaims, grinning.

“I didn’t know I wanted to until Kim asked,” he says, laughing as Kim looks smugly up at Fatimah.

“First rule of talking to your gorgeous little brother is to invite him over, Pussy Doctor,” Kim says, and Nursey busts out laughing.

Fatimah looks scandalized, but Nursey can see her stifling laughter as she herds Kim out of the kitchen and swats her ass. She comes back to see Nursey wiping his eyes and smiles at him softly.

“Things are going to be okay, Derek. I know you’re not going to stop feeling what you feel for that boy, but don’t let it get you treated badly. Wait. Did that make sense?” she says, blinking as she processes the sentence she said.

“I mean I think it was right, it just sounded ugly. I understood the sentiment,” Nursey says, smiling. “Thanks for picking up.”

“Always. Thanks for calling. Arin just came in, so I’m gonna go eat dinner now. I love you,” she says, blowing him a kiss and waving.

“Love you too, Pussy Doctor,” Nursey snorts, moving into full blown laughter when Fatimah screams and hangs up.

He feels loads better than he did before he called her, and he finds himself struck again by how easily she helps him manage his feelings. It’s still early but he wants to ride the high of this good mood left by his sister, so he brushes his teeth, gets more comfortable and goes to bed. He drifts off before he can think himself back into sadness over how bad things are with William Poindexter. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow meet Fatimah Nurse!!! I love her, she’s a perfect big sister and the exact person Nursey needs. I hope you like this! Nursey’s other relationships are important to him so I have to touch on them some, but I promise the Nurseydex Will Happen lmao
> 
> As always, leave me a fuuuuucking comment and/or come visit me on [tumblr!](https://oluranurse.tumblr.com)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dex apologizes, and life goes on.

Before Nursey knows it, finals are over and he’s moving some of his things into Lardo’s old room. He thinks he’s done really well on his tests, and that helps to offset some of the pain from the playoff loss this year. He’s excited for a year captained by Bitty, knowing that he was the best person for the job, short of Chris Chow. He has high hopes for the following year but they’re clouded by his unresolved tension with Dex.

He told Chowder after his call with his sister that he was going to be living in the Haus and that it was Dex’s responsibility to apologize and be civil. Chowder was torn between being happy for Nursey standing his ground and wanting to tear Dex a new one. He settled for twisting his face into an expression that very much showed Nursey his frustration at not being given the go ahead to yell, but hugging him anyway. Nursey is grateful for him and despite everything, he really is excited to be finally living with him and Bitty.

He’s letting himself be happy about that when he turns and sees Dex standing in the door. He watches Dex’s expressions flit between surprise, desperation, and fear before settling on annoyance.

“I thought you weren’t going to be staying here,” Dex says, walking to an empty corner to put his box down.

“Who told you that?” Nursey said, crossing his arms.

“Well. No one I guess, but. I mean, Nursey, I need this room, you know that, and—“

“I’m sorry, does me being here somehow mean that you can’t be?”

“I guess not, but—“

“Have I done anything to make you feel unwelcome?” Nursey asks, and delights just a little in Dex’s growing frustration.

“Not exactly, but—“

“Okay, then it seems to me the only problem with you staying in this room is the fact that you don’t want to live with me,” Nursey says, walking forward to get in Dex’s space. “I won the room fair and square and I’m not going anywhere. So you can be an adult and apologize to me for being a dick, or you can find yourself somewhere else to live.”

Dex’s brow furrows, but still, he says nothing. Nursey scoffs and pushes past him to walk out the door.

“Nursey, wait.”

Nursey pauses and turns around, leaning against the doorframe. Dex turns around and Nursey takes note of the rose tips of his ears and the tight set of his shoulders; he’s uncomfortable. Good.

“I’m sorry,” Dex finally says after a moment. “I did act like a giant asshole, and you didn’t deserve that.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“I could give you reasons why but they don’t really matter, do they? You’ve never done anything to me to deserve that and I should have checked myself. I really am sorry.”

Nursey nods and just looks at him for a moment. He does seem genuinely contrite, so Nursey swallows down his desire to ask if anyone put him up to this.

“Lardo’s bed only has the top bunk for some reason, so I’m going to buy a bed for the bottom and take that, if that’s cool with you.”

Dex nods, understanding the acceptance for what it is, and Nursey nods back before walking out. Dex doesn’t stop him this time.

Nursey should feel buoyant in receiving his apology, but he feels like something is missing. He feels like he and Dex still have unfinished business and he can’t for the life of him figure out what that is. He thinks he’ll try and talk to Dex throughout the summer so he’s more comfortable with where they stand when the years starts up again. He has already come out of a living situation he hated and he refuses to suffer through another year, this time with nowhere to escape.

Chowder has already completed his finals and is set to leave tomorrow, so Nursey heads to his room to see him. It looks strangely empty without all of Chowder’s adornments on the walls and Nursey misses it immediately. Chowder’s smile fills the room quickly and Nursey smirks, before tripping on empty space and landing on the side of Chowder’s bed. He laughs and somehow Nursey is less embarrassed at the sound of it.

“Smooth,” Chowder says, and Nursey flips him off as he climbs up. “What were you doing?”

“Putting up a couple of boxes. Dex is in there now.”

“Oh, is he?” Chowder says, and Nursey laughs because he’s about as subtle as a bull in a china shop.

“Yeah. He apologized. After saying he assumed that I wasn’t going to stay there.”

“Oh my GOD, I love him but he hella makes me want to punch him sometimes.”

Nursey chuckles. “What were you doing?”

“Nothing really, just finalizing traveling plans with my mom, and talking to Farms. She’s already home somehow, so we’re trying to make plans to meet up.”

Nursey asks more questions about Chowder’s plans for the summer and lets his voice wrap around him comfortably. He’s going to miss him terribly over the break, and finds himself wondering if they can make plans to see each other.

He realized earlier this year that Chowder is the only person that gets him on nearly the same level as his sister. He thinks he could have been in love with him in a different world, one that he sometimes wishes he lived in, where his thoughts are occupied by the color teal and dark eyes and summertime, instead of autumn and amber and plaid. He has a bad habit of dwelling on dreams so he pushes that to the back of his head and focuses on the here and now.

He tunes back in to Chowder rolling his eyes and taking a deep breath.

“Nursey, why do you let me talk so much?”

“I like listening to you, C.”

Chowder flips him off to hide the blush Nursey sees anyway, and Nursey laughs before pulling him into a tight hug.

“Don’t be a stranger, bro.” Nursey says, patting his shoulder as they pull apart. He stands and stretches his arms over his head.

“Of course not, you’re probably going to delete me from Snapchat by the end of the summer.” Chowder grins and Nursey misses him already. He’s definitely going to be making a trip to California.

“Alright, text me so I know you landed okay.” Nursey says, waving on his way out the door. Bitty has already left for Providence with Jack, so the only person left to say goodbye to is Ford. He calls her, and she picks up after the first ring.

“Hey, mamí, where are you?”

“Hey D, I just finished my last final of the day, so I’m on my way to my room to pack. Where you at?” she says, and he can hear her breath huffing a little as she walks.

“The Haus. You hungry? I’ll feed you.”

“Have I ever turned down free food since you’ve known me? Where you wanna go?”

“That’s true,” Nursey laughs. “Want to get some dumplings from that one place you like?”

“Ugh, oh my god, that sounds good. Stay at the Haus, I’ll meet you there in ten.”

Derek finds himself smiling, excited that he hadn’t missed Ford before they had to go their separate ways. He sits on the Haus steps so that he’s easy to find and lets his mind drift off.

He’s trying to figure out how he’ll see everyone he wants to see while still getting time with his parents, and it’s a strange feeling to get used to. Being the only brown kid in a sea full of white people, the only rich brown kid in a city where most of the people that looked like him were poor, put him in the middle of a divide he had no clue how to navigate. He didn't have the rough edges necessary to handle the teasing kids dished out or the sharp pangs of loneliness, and it had left him isolated in a lot of ways. It’s a bit of a culture shock to have so many people want to spend time with him that he’s having to decide how to manage them all.

He decides that it’s a good problem to have.

Before he knows it, he can see Ford walking up to him, her signature gait giving her away when she was still a speck in the distance. She walks everywhere like she’s running late and determined not to be, and he figures that’s probably mostly true, considering all of the responsibilities she has on her shoulders. He resolves to bring that up to her one day as he stands up and meets her halfway to the Haus, figuring it made no sense for her to walk to the door when they’d have to turn right back around.

“Got somewhere to be?” He smiles, slinging an arm around her shoulder.

“Wherever you’re taking me, I guess. How was your day?”

“Chill,” he says simply, and laughs when she rolls her eyes at him. “Dex apologized.”

“Mmm,” she says, and it’s not the same inquisitive noise Chowder tried not to make. This one very explicitly says _I appreciate and respect him apologizing but I don’t believe it’s going to be that easy_. It’s the same simple syllable he’s heard all of the women in his life make in some capacity, and he wonders for a moment how they manage to say so much with so little.

“Yeah, agreed,” he says, instead of following his train of thought. “Regardless, I’m going to be living there so he is just going to have to get his shit together.”

“I’ll get him in gear, one way or another,” Ford says lightly. Nursey decides not to ask what that means.

“So, are you excited to head back home? Where is home, anyway?” Nursey asks.

“Yeah definitely, I miss my mom and brothers a lot. Georgia! Nowhere near Bitty though, my mom lives in Decatur.”

“Isn’t that like, right outside of Atlanta?”

“Yeah, it’s not very far at all!”

“My sister lives in Atlanta, I was thinking of visiting her this summer,” Nursey says casually.

“Derek Nurse, if you come to Georgia and don’t call me, I’m gonna make your life a living hell when we get back.”

“Ay, fine, fine. You can show me around while I’m down there.” Nursey says.

Ford squeals just a little in excitement and rattles off some of the places she wants to take him as they walk. Nursey rolls his eyes while she can’t see and pulls out his phone to text his sister.

**Me: when would be the best time to come see you?  
Sis: ANYTIME  
Sis: ALL THE TIME  
Sis: you coming this summer?  
Me: yep**

Nursey’s phone starts buzzing with an incoming call and he laughs, tapping Ford’s shoulder to get her attention. He lifts up his phone when she looks up at him and answers his sister’s call.

“So, I’m gonna be working a really shitty stretch for the next two weeks, but after that I somehow have multiple days in a row and some shorter shifts. Wanna come in three weeks?” Fatimah says in lieu of a greeting.

“Well, hi to you too,” Nursey laughs. “Yes that sounds good. I just found out that one of my bros lives in Decatur, I’ve mentioned Ford, right?”

“Yeah, the new manager replacing Lardo?”

“Yeah, her. I’ll probably be visiting her some too while I’m there.”

“Okay, bring her ‘round the house, you know Kim likes to cook for new people.”

“Absolutely.”

“Okay, I’m actually at work, I gotta go. Thanks for picking up, love you.”

“Thanks for calling, love you back.”

Nursey hangs up and apologizes to Ford for interrupting her for the call. She waves his apology away.

“Was that Fatimah?” she asks.

“Yeah, we talked not too long ago and I mentioned in passing that I may come down to visit her, but we hadn’t set anything in stone. When you told me you lived in Decatur, I texted her to see what a good time frame would be for her. We decided on about three weeks from now.”

“Oh, dope. I’ll be there, so we can definitely hang out.” Ford says.

They’ve reached the restaurant and spend their lunch together making plans for the summer. He’s never been so happy to have handed a flyer to someone; the friend he’s found in their new manager is one he knows he will keep. She’s brilliant and hilarious and talented in everything she tries, and he’s never felt so fiercely protective of someone so fast. He’s excited to get to know her better this summer and in the following years. He figures with her and Chowder with him, this shit with Dex won’t be able to completely ruin his entire year.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You KNOW i had to give you a lil taste of nurseshark bc that’s just who i am as a person lmao Also Nursey is Dominican and “mami” is a term of endearment usually used towards younger siblings/members of family, so DONT make it weird, he’s just showing his love for Ford!  
> Thanks to all of my lovely lovely cheer readers, especially Nan and Hez who also edited a little bit for me!  
> You know the drill, leave me a fuuuuuucking comment cuz I’m a lonely boi, and come visit me on [tumblr!](https://oluranurse.tumblr.com)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nursey gets a well deserved break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sad and tired and I need validation like I need sleep, so I’m posting TWO WHOLE CHAPTERS in a row and they’re really two of my favorites. I hope you enjoy reading them like I enjoyed writing them!

Nursey is sprawled out on his sister’s couch waiting for dinner to finish when he receives a Snap from Dex. He’s startled; he hasn’t heard much of anything from him since he apologized, and the picture is personal, not sent in the snap group with the rest of the team.

His trip so far has been interrupted by very few thoughts of Dex since he didn't know where they stood. He talked about it with his sister just a little but she didn’t pry and he didn’t know what else to say, so he let their conversations fall to other things. It was a little overwhelming to see his name and know immediately that distance from him, in person and in his thoughts, hadn’t dampened his feelings at all.

His eyebrows pull together as he opens it, and then his breath is catching in his throat. It’s just a selfie but it’s the best Dex has ever looked; his hair has lightened streaks in it from the sun and looks tousled, as though the wind is blowing it as he takes the picture. His freckles are in clusters thicker than Nursey has ever seen. His face and shoulders are extremely red, and he’s grimacing like he’s uncomfortable— if his skin tone is anything to go by, he probably is. The caption reads “is god punishing me for catching lobsters by turning me into one?” Nursey snorts as he screenshots the picture and immediately the blue dot pops up, showing that Dex is typing within the app.

**Billydex: why did you screenshot that?  
Dmnursey: it’s your new contact picture  
Dmnursey: why else would you send it to me?  
Billydex: you’re right idk what i expected**

Nursey is still a little weirded out but he knows an olive branch when he sees one and he accepts Dex’s attempt at conversation. At least they aren’t arguing. He decides to send him a responding snap of his food when it’s done, knowing that Dex will call him a bougie asshole or something and they’ll be back on more familiar ground. In the meantime, he goes to get up and whine to his sister about how gorgeous the redhead is and is struck by the scene in front of him.

The couch is positioned so that he can see into the kitchen through the open window over the breakfast bar, and Nursey can see Kim feeding Fatimah a piece of something and following it with a chaste kiss. Nursey finally notices the soft music that’s been playing, and he can see Fatimah’s arms are wound around Kim’s waist, swaying her back and forth. She’s looking at Kim like she’s more beautiful than the soft light of a sunrise, and their love makes something happy and longing ache in his chest. He’s thankful that his sister has found something so incredible but he can’t help but see himself in Fatimah and imagine a certain six foot defenseman looking at him in affectionate annoyance as he interrupts his cooking. It’s a nice daydream, one that Nursey doesn’t often let himself have, so he watches instead of interrupting.

Fatimah smiles and says something that Nursey can’t quite catch, and Kim laughs and playfully bats at her arm, before turning them around so that she can get back at the stove. Fatimah bends nearly in half to nose into Kim’s long dark hair and it’s more than Nursey’s heart can take. He stands and stretches long and loud.

“Ugh, y'all are gross. Save your nasty gay affection for the bedroom,” he says dramatically.

Kim waggles her eyebrows at him and turns around to cup the back of Fatimah’s head, pulling her in a kiss just on the right side of inappropriate. Nursey fake gags and walks to the bathroom to the sound of their laughter, both to give them a few more sweet moments to themselves and to relieve himself. When he’s done and walks back, Fatimah has apparently been banished to the kitchen table where she sits munching on grapes. She smiles at him when he walks in and holds the bag up.

“Oh my God, I just told you to stop spoiling your dinner, why are you corrupting your baby brother?” Kim says, exasperation and affection fighting for purchase in her voice.

“He’s a six foot athlete, I don’t think a couple of grapes are going to dampen his appetite. Isn’t that right, Baby?”

“It is, but I don’t appreciate you using me in your relationship arguments,” Nursey says, stuffing a handful of grapes in his mouth to stifle his laughter when Fatimah looks over at him, eyes full of betrayal.

“Whatever, my point still stands,” she laughs, popping a grape into her mouth just to be an asshole. “When is it going to be done?”

“In like, five minutes, you big baby.”

Fatimah rolls her eyes and turns her attention back to Nursey who is laughing at their antics. He pulls out his phone now that he has her attention and shows her the picture he received. She hums as she looks at it and makes a thoughtful noise.

“This is a good picture of him,” she says. Kim turns from the stove to look over Fatimah’s shoulder, her expression reluctantly impressed.

“THAT’S your boy?” she asks, turning back to whatever she’s cooking in her wok.

“He’s definitely not mine, but yes,” Nursey answers.

“He’s cute, I’ll give you that. But you really picked the actual whitest boy you could find to fall in love with. I bet he’s from fucking Florida and likes to golf in his spare time.” Kim chirps, and Nursey bursts out laughing at how close she is to the truth.

“Actually, he’s from Maine and lobster fishing is the family business,” Nursey says, and Kim dissolves into laughter, throwing her head back and holding her stomach.

Arin walks in as she’s belly laughing and immediately smiles, kicking their shoes off at the door and following the sound into the kitchen. They stop to lay a kiss on Kim’s cheek and sit on Fatimah’s lap in the kitchen, leaning into her when she plants a kiss on their face.

“What’s so funny?” they ask, and Fatimah slides the phone over to them.

“That’s Dex, the boy Nursey’s in love with,” Fatimah says.

Arin looks up at Nurse, then back at the picture and smirks.

“He’s cute. Nice jawline, decent lips, pretty hair. What’s funny?”

“Kim is teasing me about falling for the whitest white boy I could find.”

“Why, because he’s pale with red hair?” Arin says, handing the phone back to Nursey.

“No, because he’s from Maine and lobster fishing is his family’s business.”

Kim starts cracking up again and Arin snorts, shrugging their shoulders. “Go big or go home, I guess.”

“I guess,” Fatimah scoffs.

“I guess,” Kim giggles.

“I literally hate all of you,” Nursey pouts and they all laugh at him.

Kim is still giggling as she plates their food, and everyone else heads to the sink to wash their hands as they prepare for dinner. The kitchen is bright and filled with happy chatter and laughter as they sit down for the meal Kim prepared. It looks phenomenal and Nursey remembers to take a picture before he digs in.

**Billydex: Food pictures? Aren’t those supposed to be for your “insta?”  
Dmnursey: wow, I didn’t realize you paid so much attention to my social media habits, Poindorkster  
Billydex: I didn’t realize you were still using the same chirps from our frog year, Nurse  
Dmnursey: the shoe fits. And you didn’t answer my question**

Dex responds with a picture of him grinning, captioned: “you didn’t ask a question, you hipster asshole.” His smile is big enough that his eyes are barely visible, and he’s all teeth and fake joy, his middle finger up in the air. Nursey smiles a little to himself. He knows what to do with this. This is a Dex he can work with.

Dinner is a happy, uproarious affair, and Nursey and Fatimah volunteer to do the dishes, since Kim cooked and Arin had a long shift at work. They never did many chores together growing up because of their age difference, but they fall into an easy rhythm, just like they do with everything else. Fatimah washes while Nursey dries and the easy repetitive motions are soothing something in Nursey that he didn’t even realize was unsettled. Fatimah smells like something earthy and flowery and so explicitly home, and Nursey finds himself glad for the millionth time that he decided to visit.

“Hey, you wanna smoke a blunt after this?” Fatimah asks.

Nursey is taken aback but he nods, chuckling. “You’re a doctor, shouldn’t you discourage smoking?”

Fatimah rolls her eyes. “Are you pregnant?”

“I can guarantee you that I am not.”

“Then, as an OBGYN, I don’t care. Also, you know that if I ever catch you smoking cigarettes, I will disown you.”

“I do know this,” Nursey laughs.

“Okay then. We’ll smoke a blunt,” she says, matter of fact.

They finish up the dishes and head to the back porch, leaving Kim and Arin cuddling on the couch, watching a movie. Fatimah stops in her room to grab what she needs, and Nursey heads out ahead of her, getting comfortable on their porch swing.

They have little solar powered yard lights spread out in their backyard, and their soft blue glow match the stars in the sky. It’s more stars than Nursey is used to seeing; the smog of New York City obscures the sky and he doesn’t have much time to look up at Samwell. He tears his eyes away and he can see the fire pit positioned in the center of the yard, beige chairs placed pleasingly around it. They would have a garden if they were home enough to tend to it, but the yard is well manicured and their lights do a good job of filling the empty space.

Nursey is taking a picture of his surroundings to send to Dex when Fatimah comes out, a lighter in one hand, a blunt in the other, and another blunt tucked behind her ear. She sits next to Nursey on the swing, lighting up before she puffs and passes, the motions just as comfortable as their teamwork on the dishes. Nursey takes hit after hit until he’s melting into the swing and floating on smoke.

His limbs feel heavy and weightless, his mind full of fuzzy, happy static. He watches his sister take the last hit before he speaks.

“Fats. I still love him.”

Fatimah makes a rumbling noise in her throat.

“Why is that? He’s not even nice to me.” Nursey says.

“I don’t know, Baby,” she says eventually. “There has to be something about him, because you don’t like people who don’t like you. Is he even queer?”

“I know!” His words feel slow, not leaving his mouth fast enough to express the frustration he feels. “I think it’s because I liked him before he really spoke to me. And even though he was an asshole, he was still pretty. And when he’s not being an asshole, he’s really fun. Also, he has to be queer. There’s no way I fell for a straight asshole, I don’t hate myself that much.”

“Maybe not consciously, but who knows what’s going on in that brain of yours,” Fatimah chirps.

Nursey snorts, and that gives way to full blown laughter, and soon Fatimah joins him, his intoxicated giggles too much for her to handle.

“I have the munchies, you wanna go make some cookies?” Fatimah says after her giggles have subsided.

“Yes, please.”

He sends the picture he took to Dex, hoping it captured the beauty he sees. The caption reads: “there are a lot of stars in the country”; he waits for the city boy chirps he knows are coming. He follows his sister into the kitchen, and sees her get out materials, groaning when he realizes that she intends to make them from scratch.

“Dios, Fatimah, no. Too long,” he whines, laying himself dramatically over her back. She’s only four inches shorter than him so she accepts his weight easily, rolling her eyes. She nudges him off so that she can move freely around the kitchen, laughing at his slight pout.

“Fine, you’re lucky I bought some pre made cookie dough the other day.” She says, putting back everything except the cookie sheet, and heading to the fridge.

“Then why would you even consider making them from scratch?” he asks, exasperated.

“They taste better!”

“We’re high, Fatimah, every cookie we eat is gonna be the best cookie we ever had.”

“You right,” she says, laughing and laying out parchment paper on the cookie sheet.

His phone pings as she's putting the cookies in the oven, and it’s Dex with another picture. He expected chirps, but Dex has sent a picture of the night sky he sees, stars glittering over the dark expanse of the ocean, sand glowing bone white in the moonlight. He receives a chat from Dex within the app.

**Billydex: they’re even brighter where I’m from, city boy**

Nursey smiles and almost blushes; if they were different people he might think he was being flirted with.

He chalks it up to being high.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you’ve fallen in love with Fatimah Nurse, this was the chapter of your dreams. I hope you love her partners Kim and Arin too. Kim is a culinary mastermind turned veterinarian, and Arin is probably a research analyst or something equally impressive. It may also please you to know that Fatimah is 5’10, Kim is 5’1 and Arin is 5’6.   
> Oh, and I hope the Pussy Doctor joke makes sense, since she’s an OBGYN and Kim is a vet. Pussy? Get it? I mean it’s crude but. Anyway. Okay. Thanks for reading lmao


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We finally learn why Dex acted the way he did.

Nursey’s summer passed him by in flashes of friendship and family and joy. He saw Ford a lot while he was in Georgia, and got to meet her family. Her two brothers quickly became two of Nursey’s favorite people, and he managed to charm the pants off of Ford’s mom, much to her annoyance. He chirped her to hell for how bad her accent got when she was back home, and learned a lot about her in that short time. Introducing her to Fatimah was the best and worst thing he’s ever done; they got along like white on rice and he spent the rest of that evening alone being dragged by the both of them.

He didn’t get to go to California like he wanted to, but Chowder and Farmer wanted to visit New York and Nursey was happy to be their personal tour guide. He told them about his feelings for Dex over coffee after a long night out, hungover and half delirious. Farmer wasn’t too surprised, but Chowder was, and he spent the rest of the morning being prematurely exasperated at tension he’s going to be forced to deal with.

Things with Dex have been… weird. They’ve exchanged Snaps all summer but no texts, really no other communication, and strange as it is, it’s also kind of nice; he’s managed to learn a lot of things about Dex that he missed over their past two years as teammates. He finds out that Dex has three older brothers, a younger sister, and a handful of nieces and nephews. He finds out that both Dex and his younger sister inherited the fiery hair from their mother, but Dex was the only one to get their dad’s weird whiskey eyes. He finds out that Dex likes to make his nieces and nephews laugh, that his childhood room is still adorned with Marvel posters, that he has a really old cat named Ankles that he got when he was three. Nursey finds out that each new thing he learns fills him with hopeless and reluctant affection.

He’s spent most of his time back in New York sulking as he waits for Dex to text him back and grinning like an idiot when he finally does. His moms had given up on getting him to hang out with him, too frustrated with his weird attitude and lack of a desire to talk about it. He’s resolutely not thinking about that and distracting himself with junk food and old movies when his phone rings. It’s Dex, and it's a new form of communication they haven’t touched yet, and his mind jumps to disaster.

“Dex?” he answers, tension threaded in his voice.

“Hey, Nursey,” Dex says. His voice doesn’t carry any particular weight but Nursey doesn't feel any less nervous.

“Hey. You okay?”

“Your accent is stronger,” Dex answers.

“It should be, I am in New York,” Nursey answers, confused.

“Yeah, I guess that’s true,” Dex says. They sit in silence a moment, Dex not filling it despite being the one to initiate the call.

“Dex. Are you okay?” Nursey asks again.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry. I’m a little high because it was the only way I felt like I was going to be able to talk to you about why I was such a dick about Dibs,” Dex answers. Nursey lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

“Okay then. You’re wanting to do this now?”

“I figure we should before we’re living together.”

Nursey blushes and decidedly ignores that fact.

“Okay,” he says. He pauses his movie and gets settled, putting his phone on speaker. Dex takes a deep breath.

“So, I was talking to Trish and I told her what happened and she brought it to my attention that it might—“ Dex pauses, like the words are hard to find, and Nursey doesn’t doubt that with his brain being clouded by marijuana. “She said that it may have come off that I was upset because of some prejudice.”

“I would be lying if I said it hadn’t crossed my mind.” Nursey says, and Dex sighs.

“I didn’t even think of it. I just assumed that you wouldn’t think that of me because— I don’t know why.”

Nursey makes an agreeable noise in his throat. He’s interested in how this conversation is going to go.

“She mentioned privilege which is something you have said before but I guess I just thought that you were trying to rile me up because you saw my Republican sticker or whatever. But anyway. She laid it out for me, how it may have looked that a guy that looked like me was so put out by having to live with a guy that looked like you that also isn’t straight, and I want you to know that that is not the case. And I am so so sorry that I made you feel that way, bro.”

It’s more words strung together than Nursey has heard from Dex in the two years they’ve known each other, and he’s staring blankly at his phone in shock. He almost doesn’t want to believe it, but it’s more sincere than he’s ever heard Dex be and he wants to take the kindness at face value.

“Um,” Nursey says eloquently. “I appreciate the apology.”

“Okay, good. That’s good. Good start, right?” Dex says, letting out a breath.

“Yeah, definitely. Uh, so if it’s not because of like, low key racism, or homophobia, why was it such an issue for you?”

“Come on, like you don’t know,” Dex scoffs.

“Bro, we literally just established that I don’t,” Nursey deadpans.

“Fuck, you’re right.” Dex says. “I don’t know, it’s just obvious that I’m not well liked. And I knew that if it came down to a choice between me and you, they would pick you every time.”

Nursey is dumbfounded. He has absolutely no idea how to respond to this, and the silence must go for too long because Dex clears his throat.

“Dex. What does that even mean?” Nursey finally says.

“I mean like. I thought one of us would get a room from Ransom and Holster and the other from Lardo, but they gave it to Ollie and Wicks. You and Lardo are so close and so are you and Chowder and I figured if she had to choose she wouldn’t choose me. And neither would anyone else. So I had to fight for it, because I need it but I didn’t want to say that I needed it.” Dex rambles, like he’s afraid that if he says it any slower he won’t say it at all. “And then the coin landed on its side and even though they said they would give the room to us both, I figured we would fight so much that one of us would eventually have to go.”

“So what, you figured if you sat on the floor long enough, someone would take pity and give you the room?” Nursey says, bitterness he didn’t realize he still felt seeping into his voice.

“No, Nurse,” Dex says tiredly. Nursey can imagine the hand he’s running over his face. “I was trying to figure out ways I could convince everyone to keep me around.”

Nursey’s heart clenches at that, and he’s so glad that Dex is so many miles away because he doesn’t think he would have been able to stop himself from doing something stupid, like hugging him.

“Dex, I’m happy to share the room with you. And Bitty loves you and so does Chowder, and they wouldn’t for a second choose between us. We’ve been fighting for two years now and they haven’t picked sides before. You don’t have to make yourself useful for someone to take care of you. You’re our teammate. We got your back.”

Dex is silent and Nursey sits in it, no stranger to needing time to process.

“Thank you,” Dex says eventually.

“Yeah, anytime, Poindexter.”

“Alright, I think I’m done talking about how I feel for the rest of my life,” Dex says, and Nursey laughs at him.

“You’ve got the emotional range of a teaspoon,” Nursey says, and cringes immediately at his nerdiness as Dex laughs.

“Fuck you, Hermione,” Dex says, still laughing, and hangs up the phone.

Nursey restarts his movie, smiling a little to himself. He finds himself excited for the year to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO, I hope you liked what I came up with, I was kind of tired of the whole “big gay panic” or “i deserved it more bc I’m poor” argument everyone likes to make in these kinds of fics, where they think Dex is justified and Nursey is stuck doing emotional labor so that Dex doesn’t feel like he was as much of an asshole as he was. He was an asshole. He needed to see why what he did was so shitty. He doesn’t get to get a pass, not when I’m writing the fic. Also, Trish is referring to Dex’s lil sister Patricia Ruth, i have a few uhhhhhhhh headcanons about the Poindexters
> 
> Anyway, now that the hashtag discourse is over the fun stuff is coming, hope you’re ready for some LOVE  
> Leave me a fuuuuuuuucking comment boys, I’m lonely and also tired and come see me on tumblr, you know the drill


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s a little early for Dex to meet the parents, don’t you think?

Nursey’s anxiety and excitement about how everything is going to go causes him to head back to Samwell a few days earlier than necessary. He had his new bed shipped to the Haus, and he figures he may as well get there early and set up shop. He’s riding down with his moms, who both insisted on being there and driving the four hours, despite him trying valiantly to get them to let him book a flight so that they wouldn’t have to make the trip.

Their reasoning is that they lost so much time with him over the summer to his ridiculous pining and he’s properly embarrassed and relents. The trip is good; he’s missed his moms, missed speaking the languages of his childhood, even though half of the conversations are them teasing him relentlessly. They pull up to the house and Nursey tries to keep them from helping him take his bags to the room he’ll be sharing with Dex.

“It’s okay, I got it, really. You drove all this way, I can take my bags,” he says in Spanish as he crawls out of the backseat.

“I drive you all this way, and as soon as we get here you’re trying to get rid of me? Ungrateful,” Juiliana says, punctuating the sentence with a light slap to his shoulder.

“Ay, no, okay, I’m sorry! Dios, Mommy, I just feel bad that you made this trip, I don’t want you to do the heavy lifting too.” Nursey says, smiling as he rubs his arm.

“Drama queens, both of you. You’re such a sweet boy, thinking of us like that,” Aaliyah says in Arabic from her position in the trunk. She heaves out a bag and puts it on the ground. “But I know you bought a bed, so you’re going to put that together while we help put away some of your things and make sure you don’t hurt yourself.”

Her tone brokers no argument and Nursey sighs, grabbing two of the heaviest bags to make himself feel better. He grabs the key Lardo gave him and unlocks the door, only to be immediately assaulted by the smell of cookies . He sets his bags down out of the way of the front door and heads to the kitchen.

“Hey, Bitty! I thought you were—“ he starts, stopping when he sees a mop of red hair instead of a blonde coif. Dex looks up, surprised, setting down the cookies he’s pulling out of the oven.

“Oh, hey Nursey. I thought you weren’t coming down for a few more days?” Dex says, taking off his oven mitts and turning to the oven to turn it off.

Nursey knows he should respond but his brain is occupied by the expanse of tan skin of Dex’s collarbones and shoulders, freckles on full display as he stands there in a Samwell tank top and khaki shorts. His hair is messy and long, curling a little over his ears and his forehead, a little sweaty in the August heat. Dex’s brow is furrowed waiting for Nursey to respond, but Nursey is startled into gear at the sound of the front door opening.

“Baby, what happened? You get lost in this house? You forget about us?” Juiliana calls out.

“Juli, leave him alone,” Aaliyah says affectionately, and Nursey hears his mom snort.

“It’s perfectly reasonable that he got lost, that boy couldn’t find his way out of a paper bag,” she says and Nursey turns abruptly from the kitchen to meet them at the door.

“Sorry Ma, I got distracted,” Nursey says, just as Dex peeks his head out of the room.

Juiliana looks at Dex’s sweaty hair and Nursey’s growing blush and grins, and Nursey’s eyes widen in horror. He looks to Aaliyah, pleading with his eyes for her to reign in her wife and knows it’s a lost cause when he sees the twinkle in her eye.

“Mama, no, please—“ Nursey starts before Juiliana interrupts him with rapid fire Spanish.

“I see, so this is why you didn’t want your moms in here? Wanted to come in and give this white boy some loving without us embarrassing you? Didn’t want him to meet us yet, is that it?” she says, positively beaming at the discomfort on Nursey’s face. Dex looks embarrassed, and he slides back into the kitchen before he can get roped into conversation.

“You’ve got this boy making cookies for you, Baby?” Aaliyah says and Nursey groans.

“Not you too, Amma, you’re supposed to be on my side!” Nursey says, switching to Arabic quickly.

“No sides here, mijo. But I guess I’ll leave you alone for now,” Juiliana says, switching to English and patting him on his cheek. “Now come on, grab your bags, show me this room of yours.”

He leads them upstairs, muttering about embarrassment and disrespect, and is silenced by the scene in front of him. He expected a box to put together and items to rearrange, but Dex has already put the bed together and fit it comfortably under the bunk. Their boxes have been organized but he left his things packed up, presumably to talk with Nursey first to see how he would like everything placed. He’s touched, and surprised, and he turns to his moms who are looking at him smugly.

“I thought you said that boy wasn’t interested in you,” Aaliyah says.

“I—what? He isn’t, he’s just handy,” Nursey sputters.

“Well that was very nice of him, wasn’t it Juli?” she says, putting down her box and taking the bags out of her wife’s hands.

Juiliana smiles up at her in thanks and looks around the room. It looks a little worse for wear and it’s a little too warm, but she can tell why Nursey wants to live here. It has love and joy written in the walls and she’s happy he has it. She puts her hands on her hips and nods.

“This is a good place,” she says, smiling at Nursey. “Now introduce me to this boy you’ve been talking about all summer.”

Dex chooses that moment to clear his throat, holding a plate full of cookies.

“Hi, sorry I didn’t introduce myself earlier. I’m Dex, I baked some cookies if you guys want some,” he says, in nearly perfect Spanish, if a little stiff.

Nursey’s mouth drops open and he stares as his mothers go shake Dex’s hand.

“Derek, you didn’t tell us he knew Spanish!” Juiliana says, switching back to English.

Nursey doesn’t respond, still dumbfounded at this turn of events.

“I don’t think he knew, ma’am.” Dex speaks up when Nursey doesn’t, moving into the room and holding out the plate. “It’s never really come up. I started learning last year. Nursey, Tango, and Whiskey all speak it, I figured it was a good thing to know in case I needed to talk to any family members.”

“That’s very considerate of you, Dex,” Aaliyah says, taking a cookie and smiling at him with approval. “Derek, honey, close your mouth, you look like a cartoon character.”

Nursey’s mouth snaps closed and he blinks at Dex in the doorway, holding an honest to God plate of cookies, speaking SPANISH to his MOTHERS. He has a lot of feelings and a lot of things to say and no way to articulate them.

“You put my bed together?” Nursey finally says.

“Yeah, did you think I was going to let you do it? Do you even know what a screwdriver looks like?” Dex chirps.

“Fuck you,” Nursey says automatically, rolling his eyes.

“Derek!” Juiliana and Aaliyah say at the same time, and Nursey slaps his hand over his mouth, looking properly scolded. Dex looks like he’s trying to hold back a laugh and Nursey narrows his eyes at him.

“How long have you been here?” Nursey asks, and finally takes the plate from Dex.

“Oh, just today,” Dex says, hands fidgeting like he wishes he had something to do.

“Chill,” Nursey says, and Dex rolls his eyes.

“Okay, I guess I’ll leave you all to it. It was nice to meet you two,” Dex says.

Aaliyah and Juiliana express similar sentiments before he leaves the room and they turn on Derek.

“I thought you said he was terrible?” Aaliyah says.

“Well, he can’t have been too terrible with the way he whined over him all summer,” Juiliana says.

“Maaaaaa,” Nursey whines. “Can we just finish getting my things up here and never talk about this again?”

Juiliana pats Nursey’s cheek and agrees and they head back downstairs. Dex tries to offer his help when Nursey takes the cookie plate back into the kitchen, but they all decline, since he put the bed together. Before Nursey knows it, all of his boxes are in from the car and his mothers are kissing him goodbye.

“Don’t be a stranger, mijo, call us sometime. We miss you,” Juiliana says, hugging him tight.

“Yes, it’s good that you talk to Fats but you can talk to us too. We will listen. Your dad too,” Aaliyah says, grabbing his face and kissing his cheek before holding him close to her.

“Okay, I will. Love you, let me know when you guys get home. Tell Daddy and Chelsea I said hi.”

He holds the door open for Aaliyah to get in the driver’s seat and Juiliana gets his attention before she gets in the passenger's side.

“He seems like a good boy, but be careful, Baby. Things can get messy in such close quarters,” she says softly, and Nursey nods his understanding.

He hugs her one more time for good measure and waves as they drive away. He stands on the street for a moment, getting himself together. He prefers flying to driving because it’s always so hard to tear himself away from his parents when they drive; the time he gets with them never seems like enough.

After he’s done letting himself be sad, he tries to focus on the problem at hand: the redheaded apparent baker who learned Spanish in case he needed to communicate with his family, and practically glows after a summer on the beach and—. He runs his hand over his face before taking a deep breath and turning to walk back inside.

Dex is nowhere to be seen when Nursey walks in, so he heads back upstairs to find him on the floor, surrounded by boxes and looking like he doesn’t know where to begin.

“Hey,” Nursey says, sticking his hands in his pockets.

“Hey,” Dex answers.

“You down to put some shit away? If I don’t do it now, I won’t do it for weeks,” Nursey says.

Dex agrees and they work for a while, deciding how to arrange things and where to put their belongings in their shared space. It’s tedious work but it doesn’t take very long, even though their mutual silence makes it feel like forever. With what Dex told him over the summer, Nursey has a feeling their lack of conversation has a lot to do with Dex feeling contrite and worried and having no idea what to do about it.

He’s determined to put his own feelings aside and be Dex’s friend: it’s the only way they’re going to make it through the next couple of years.

“Dex, you don’t have to tiptoe around me,” Nursey says as he finishes tucking his sheet under his mattress.

“What do you mean?” Dex says, arranging his clothes into his dresser.

“I don't know, I feel like before, we would have bickered about twelve different things by now. I know you’re trying to make up for the dibs thing but I’ve already forgiven you, bro. Yell at me or something,” Nursey says, smiling.

Dex is silent for a second as he shuffles his clothes around.“You were talking about me all summer?” he says eventually, smirking.

Nursey snaps back, and just like that they’re arguing. It’s different now, playful and teasing, no longer biting and aggressive. Nursey isn’t fooled into thinking that those fights will never happen, but he’s optimistic that things between them are going to be better than they’ve ever been before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hnnnnnng this is my FAVORITE CHAPTER i’ve been dying to post it! i still don’t have a full grip on what i’m doing after this but i just had to post it.  
> introducing: Aaliyah and Juiliana Hernandez-Hadadd!!! i love them so much, Juli is Dominican and Aaliyah is Egyptian and i LOVE THEM, i have so many thoughts, please come scream at me on tumblr and if you like them, i’ll make a post about Nursey’s family dynamic!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nursey is a wreck, and Dex likes to fix things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm literally posting these chapters together bc I really wanna get to chapter 8. Enjoy this little interlude of Dex being gay and too gay to see it, cause I'm bringing the pain, lads

“Nursey,” Dex calls.

Nursey hears it distantly, even though his desk is right by the door. He has some R&B going softly while he writes his paper, his tried and true study genre, and he hasn’t moved from his spot in nearly five hours. Dex calls his name again before he tears his eyes away from his computer.

“Yeah, sorry. What’s up?” He says, voice wrecked from disuse. He knows he must look terrible if Dex’s grimace is anything to go by.

“Have you eaten today?” Dex asks. Nursey shakes his head and Dex huffs a frustrated breath and tosses a Gatorade at him.

“You know the drill. Finish your paragraph and go shower, Nurse. You’ve been studying too long.”

Nursey grumbles back but drinks his Gatorade and does as he’s told. He’s never really been good at prioritizing self care when there are so many other things to be done, and it’s something that Dex noticed immediately in living with him. Apparently, this is a fact that drives Dex insane, and he’s taken to reminding Nursey to take care of himself. Nursey has to admit that it’s nice, as weird as it is. Junior year is kicking his ass, and no one knows enough about his habits to keep an eye on him. He and Dex have worked up an easy rhythm and Nursey knows that it’s easier to do what he says than endure his well intentioned wrath.

He closes his computer and drags his hands down his face spending a little extra time rubbing his eyes. The world comes back sharply when he opens them, and the smile he sends Dex’s way is sheepish. Dex rolls his eyes.

“How did you make it through this much of college?” Dex asks, not for the first time.

“Worked myself into sickness to make sure I got all my shit done and then used the free time to recover,” Nursey shrugs.

“At least you’re self aware,” Dex quips.

Nursey winks as he guzzles down the Gatorade and sets the bottle on his desk before standing and stretching. He lets his shirt ride up, too exhausted to do anything to prevent it. He opens his eyes to see Dex staring at his exposed strip of skin and he smirks.

“Like what you see, Poindexter?” He chirps.

“A college kid with dark circles bigger than his own ego? No thanks,” Dex chirps back, his ears turning pink as he turns around and walks out the door. “Go wash your ass, Nurse.”

“Thanks for the drink!” Nursey calls as Dex walks away.

Nursey heads to the bathroom and is sighing the moment the warm water hits his body. He lets the warmth wake him up and relax the tension in his muscles. He scrubs slowly and begrudgingly thanks Dex for making him get up. He gets out of the shower after a time and dresses himself in his most comfortable clothes; he slips on his glasses, eyes too tired for contacts after staring at his laptop for so long. He follows his nose to the smell of food cooking in the kitchen and finds Chowder, Dex, and Ford sitting at the kitchen table, something cooking in a giant crockpot behind them.

“Oh my God, that smells good. What is that?” Nursey groans, plopping down at the table next to Ford and slinging his arm around her.

“I’m making barbecue. I made some coleslaw too, it’s in the fridge,” Ford says, and Nursey leans over to kisses her on the cheek, much to her chagrin.

“Did you make some sweet tea too, Georgia?” Nursey chirps, and Ford swings her hand back to slap him in his chest.

“You’re really talking shit like I can’t limit your access to my food,” she says.

“Noooo,” Nursey whines, “I’m kidding! I love you and I’m very hungry, please feed me.”

“You are an actual child,” Ford says, but she’s smiling fondly. “It should be done in about 30 minutes, I actually have class so I won’t be here for the next couple of hours, but please help yourselves.”

“Oh, I have class too. I’ll walk with you,” Chowder says, already packing his things into his backpack.

“Cool, see y’all later!” Ford waves as they walk out of the kitchen, and both Dex and Nursey call out goodbyes.

Dex’s goodbye sounds a little distracted and Nursey turns back to him to find him staring. He startles when Nursey’s gaze meets his and turns his eyes back to the table, ears turning red.

“You, uh. Glasses?” Dex says eloquently. Nursey furrows his brow.

“Yeah? What about them?” Nursey replies.

“I just. Didn’t know you had them?” Dex says. “Nice. They’re nice, I mean.” The red on the tips of his ears has moved to his cheeks. Nursey smirks.

“Wow, did William Jilliam Poindexter actually compliment me? Are we in the Upside Down?”

“I’m ignoring that. When did Ford say the food would be done?” Dex says, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms, his rosy cheeks betraying his slight embarrassment.

Nursey lets him off the hook by groaning dramatically and sliding down in his chair. “Thirty minutes. I don’t think I can wait that long, Dexy.”

Dex rolls his eyes again and stands, moving to the crockpot to give it a quick stir. Nursey tips his head back to watch as Dex gives it a taste, closing his eyes and groaning at the flavor. The sound makes something warm stir in Nursey’s belly and he lifts his head back up quickly, trying to ward off the blush before it comes.

“It’s hot enough and the meat is done, we can eat,” Dex says, reaching into the fridge for the cole slaw.

“Good enough for me,” Nursey says, rising to grab the buns from atop the fridge.

He hands them to Dex and watches nimble fingers pull apart bread and fork pulled pork like it’s an art. He refocuses before Dex can notice, and grabs the buns to create his own sandwich. They work silently next to each other, eating as they stand against the counter, too eager to walk the two steps to the table.

“Did you manage to finish your homework?” Dex asks before taking another bite.

“Nah, I still have a paragraph and the conclusion, and then I need to edit it and shit,” Nursey says around a mouthful of food.

“When’s it due?”

“Monday.”

“Okay, it’s only Friday, that means you can take a break for a few hours,” Dex says, preparing another sandwich and handing it over to Nursey before starting his own. “You can sleep or we can watch something. But you need to keep yours eyes off the computer for a while.”

“Damn, okay Mama Dex. Whatever you say,” Nursey says, grinning cheekily. “Also, thanks. You know, for looking out for me.”

“Got your back, bro.”

They eventually decide to stream Stranger Things for the millionth time, sitting comfortably on the Nasty Green Couch. Nursey pretends he doesn’t feel Dex stealing glances at him, and he catches himself stealing glances of his own. They sit together comfortably for a while before  Nursey decides to ask something that’s been on his mind for a long time.

“Dex,” Nursey says.

Dex looks over at him and makes a questioning noise.

“Why did you hate me so much the last couple of years?”

Dex looks at him for a moment, trying to see if Nursey is antagonizing him, but he finds nothing but sincerity in his gaze.

“I didn’t hate you, Nursey. I just didn’t know what to do with you,” Dex sighs, turning down their show to leave it on as background noise.

“What does that mean?”

“I dunno, we were just opposites in a lot of ways; every time you talked it felt like a personal affront to me, like you were trying to rile me up. I knew you weren’t, but I was sensitive and uptight, and by the time I realized it was just who you were, I had already established myself as the Guy Who Bickers With Nursey. Seemed easier to roll with it than try and change it.”

Nursey looks at him thoughtfully as he takes in his words. “Yeah, I get that. I guess I kind of felt the same way. It seemed like the best way to get you out of your shell at first, but the lines between fun and serious got blurred too often and then I didn’t know how else to interact with you.”

“Well, we figured it out,” Dex says simply.

Nursey nods and doesn’t say anything as Dex turns the volume back up on the TV. He likes the way their friendship has changed, and if this is all he’s ever going to get, it will just have to be enough.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things were bound to get messy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the chapter where it earns its mature rating, it's not explicit per se, but it is sexy. please feel free to message me if you wanna know what happens so that you can skip over it!

Living with Dex is easier than Nursey ever imagined it could be, and he’s enjoying their living arrangement, despite their rocky start. Their bickering has yet to turn into anything genuinely angry and they move around each other within their shared space like they’ve been doing it for years. In a way, they kind of have: they’ve been navigating the locker room and the rink and their shared friendships, with a difficulty they couldn’t overcome. They’re good now, and as much as Nursey is happy to say it, he’s also miserable. 

His crush has increased exponentially and he has no idea of what to do about it.

Chowder, Farmer and Ford keep reminding him to figure out if Dex is even gay, which he staunchly refuses to do. He already feels like he’s perving on the guy enough and he doesn’t want to add intrusive questions to the mix. Fatimah keeps telling him to just go for it, but he’s not an impulsive guy and he doesn’t have it in him to face potential rejection head on. So, he’s just been torturing himself instead by hanging out with Dex and getting to know him better. It hurts, because the closer they get, the more Nursey finds himself falling for him.

It’s a terrible plan, but it’s what he’s got, so he’s rolling with it.

Right now, it’s late and he’s laying on Chowder’s bed reading while Chowder and Dex do a coding sprint in his room, since it’s a little bigger. He’s fine with the arrangement; Chowder’s room is such an extension of him that Nursey finds a lot of comfort in being here. Not to mention, it’s the warmest room in the Haus, and any space where Nursey can comfortably be bundled up is a space he’s happy in.

He’s nearing the last couple of pages on his book when Chowder and Dex come in, looking pleased, if a little exhausted. 

“All done?” Nursey says, moving to give the space back to Chowder.

“No, don’t get up! It’s Friday!” Chowder says with a grin.

“Okay? Does that mean I can't go back to my room?” Nursey says, confused. 

“No, it’s Frog Friday, asshole. We’re dog piling and watching movies,” Dex says, plopping down on the bed, forcing Nursey to scramble into a comfortable upright position.

Chowder grins at the both of them before getting comfortable on Nursey’s other side, forcing him to the middle of the pile. He’s got the remote in his hand, and is flipping on Netflix before Nursey can get another word in.

“Well, okay. You want me to order pizza?” Nursey asks and they both groan their approval. Nursey whips out his phone and orders everything and pays, telling them they’re welcome to pay him back if they want, but not insisting on it. 

Nursey and Dex argue back and forth about what movie to watch, Chowder only chiming in to officially veto a choice. He scrolls past the children’s section and something catches Nursey’s eye.

“Wait, C, go back. I think I saw El Dorado,” Nursey says, grinning.

“Hell yeah, if it’s there, that’s what we’re watching,” Chowder says, fist pumping triumphantly when he finds it.

“What’s El Dorado?” Dex asks.

Nursey and Chowder both make indignant exclamations at Dex and say in perfect unison: “The road to eeeeeel doraaaaadooooo.”

Dex blinks at them. “Was that supposed to answer my question?”

“Oh, we’re definitely watching it now,” Chowder says, as Nursey’s phone rings with a call from their delivery person. 

“Pizza’s here,” he says, and untangles himself to head to the door.  He hears footsteps behind him, and turns around to see Dex following him.

“What are you doing, Poindexter?” Nursey says.

“I’m coming to get the pizza. The odds are stacked against you tripping and wasting our dinner,” Dex chirps.

“That happened ONCE,” Nursey argues.

Dex just looks at him.

“Okay, fine, Jesus. I’ll get napkins and beers instead,” Nursey grumbles, secretly delighting in Dex’s smug smirk.

Nursey turns and heads to the kitchen, calling over his shoulder to remind Dex that he already paid. He grabs what he needs from the kitchen and heads back up the stairs, Dex following close behind. He trips as he gets to the threshold of Chowder’s room, and Dex snorts.

“I told you,” he says smugly.

“Fuck off,” Nursey says good naturedly, handing the drinks to Chowder who is trying desperately not to laugh at him. 

They get settled with their pizza and beer and, after giving Dex a quick synopsis, Chowder turns the movie back on. They get into it, laughing at appropriate intervals, Nursey trying valiantly not to quote his favorite parts. He can tell that Dex, at the very least, doesn’t hate the movie, and he’s glad. He can’t hold himself back from singing It’s Tough to Be a God, grinning when Chowder joins him and laughing through it at the look of fond exasperation on Dex’s face.  It seems like it’s too soon when the movie ends and he and Chowder both look at Dex expectantly.

“I still can’t believe Tulio and Miguel weren’t dating,” Dex finally says, and Nursey bursts out laughing.

“I can’t believe that what you took from that movie was the thinly veiled homoerotic subtext. I didn’t realize your gaydar was so good,” Nursey says, still laughing.

“Well, it takes one to know one,” Dex says.

Nursey blinks at him, and Chowder snorts.

“We’ve been friends for three years and that’s how you decide to come out?” Chowder chirps, and Dex smiles, relief evident in his expression at Chowder accepting it with calm humor.

“What would you have preferred, Chow? To find me sucking some dude’s dick in the bathroom at a kegster?” Dex snaps back, smiling at Chowder’s delighted laughter.

“Fair enough,” he says, holding out his hand for a fist bump.

“Dude, I can’t believe you let me call you a homophobe for three years,” Nursey finally says.

“I mean, I kind of was. And I didn't really know what I identified with or anything. Plus, you liked to throw it at me when we fought, and who was I to take that from you?” Dex says lightly.

“How kind of you,” Nursey says, grinning.

“I feel kind of left out now,” Chowder jokes, and Dex and Nursey both laugh.

“I mean I’m always down to be your experiment, C,” Nursey says, waggling his eyebrows.  

Chowder and Dex both snort and he smirks, always happy to be the reason for his friends’ laughter. Chowder punctuates his laughter with a yawn and Nursey takes that is his cue to leave him to his bed. They clean up their mess and he and Dex bid Chowder goodnight before carrying their trash downstairs.

Nursey can’t help the way his heart beats double time in his chest, feeling so excited and so terrified to have what he wants within his reach. He refuses to mack on the guy when he’s only just come out to him, so he holds his joy close to himself and tucks it under his heart to deal with later. He bumps Dex’s shoulder as they throw their garbage away.

“You could have told me, Dex. It’s not like I would have felt any type of way about you,” Nursey says. 

“We weren’t friends,” Dex shrugs, “not like that anyway. I still kind of thought you were an asshole and we were fighting all the time and— it’s kind of immature but I was afraid you would reject me for coming to you needing something after being such a dick for so long. I told Bitty instead.”

“That makes sense,” Nursey nods. “I’m glad you told us.”

Dex’s smile is a small thing, but it’s warm and the joy Nursey has tucked away pulses behind his heart, making his smile back brighter than he normally lets Dex see.

He doesn’t notice how Dex’s eyes soften in the light of it.

Nursey follows Dex upstairs to their room, happy to finally get to bed. They don’t bother turning on a lamp, the light of the moon peeking through their curtainless windows is bright enough to see by. Nursey turns back from closing the door, and his  breath catches when he sees Dex pull his hoodie off. He rushes past him to his bed in an effort to decidedly not stare at Dex’s bare chest, and he trips. Dex is there well before he could hit the ground, one hand at Nursey’s waist, the other gripping his arm.

“Is it going to be a recurring thing, you tripping immediately after walking into a room?” Dex chirps. He pulls Nursey up, gaze flickering from Nursey’s eyes to his lips and back.

“Is it ever going to get old, you making fun of me for it?” Nursey retorts, wanting Dex to let him go and really really hoping that he doesn’t. He licks his lips and watches as Dex’s eyes track the movement. He takes a tentative step closer and Dex’s fingers tense.

“Never,” Dex says back, and pulls Nursey to him.

Nursey stares at him, pulling his lip between his teeth. Dex smells good, like the cologne he likes and pizza and something that’s just so Dex, and he looks wrecked already, cheeks flushed and eyelids low. His skin is warm under Nursey’s hands, and his palms feel large splayed on Nursey’s back. He notices as he’s this close that Dex has a pale scar under his left eye, and Nursey raises a hand to thumb across it, like his fingertip will read the story in it. Dex leans his face into Nursey’s palm and they hold each other there, under the moonlight, in quiet tension, until Nursey feels like he’s going to burst. 

He goes to ask Dex what’s going to happen next, and is being kissed within an inch of his life before he can speak.

He sighs into it, feeling satisfied in a way he didn't know he was missing. Dex kisses like Nursey is the best thing he’s ever tasted, and Nursey whimpers. Dex smiles against full lips, tightening his grip where he’s holding onto Nursey’s hips.

“Eager for it, Nurse?” he says, his voice wrecked, his tone teasing. 

“You’re such a goddamned  _ asshole, _ ” Nursey growls, pulling Dex back to him with fingers in hair and teeth pulling at lips. 

He walks them backwards to his bed, separating only to get on it comfortably before he’s reaching for Dex. They fall together, and Dex reaches down to pull Nursey’s shirt off, groaning when they’re skin to skin. Dex is straddling him and they’re moving together, hard through soft sweatpants, eager, desperate.

Dex pulls his sweatpants down just enough to free himself, and Nursey’s mouth waters at the sight of him. He tugs his down as well and Dex grins, licking his hand before grabbing the both of them. They groan softly at the feel of each other, slowing their thrusts to enjoy the slick slide of skin. Nursey pulls Dex back to him with a moan, swallowing Dex’s breaths like they were made for him. Dex speeds his hand up and Nursey forces their mouth together, offering up his sounds for Dex to take. Dex’s other hand cups Nursey’s jaw, his thumb swiping over Nursey’s bottom lip.

They move together, riding the wave of long time comings and mutual arousal, and Nursey feels drunk on the smell of him, their shared heat, the taste of his kisses. They work together as smoothly as they do on the ice, except here, these moves are just for each other. He stares into Dex’s face as their hips move erratically and Dex smiles, speeding up his hand.

“Come on, Derek, come on. I wanna feel you, please,” he whispers, and Nursey is gone. 

He makes a high, pitchy sound he’ll deny if asked and comes so hard he sees God. His breath is still heaving when he opens his eyes, and Dex is staring at him like he’s never seen him before. His hand is still moving over them slowly and Nursey hisses, oversensitive.

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” Dex says, letting them go immediately. Nursey blinks and smiles lazily, wiping his hand through the mess he left on his stomach and reaching for Dex. He grips him gently, using his own come to slick the way.

“Jesus, Derek, fuck,” Dex shivers, holding onto Nursey for dear life.

Nursey sits up and uses his other hand to grip Dex’s head and pull them together. “God, you feel so good Dex. Didn’t think I’d get to see you like this, fucking gorgeous,” he whispers against Dex’s lips and Dex is coming with a groan.

They sit like that, foreheads pressed together, breathing each other’s air, until Dex’s tremors stop. He reaches down and grabs the shirt Nursey discarded and uses it to wipe them clean, laughing at the way Nursey turns up his nose.

“That’s so nasty. I like that shirt, asshole,” Nursey says, voice slow and sleepy.

“Is asshole my name now?” Dex chirps.

“Should be. Get off and stop chirping me, I’m too sex drunk to have good comebacks,” Nursey slurs.

Dex rolls off of him with a laugh and wiggles off his sweatpants before huddling under Nursey’s comforter. Nursey tries to hide his surprise, having thought that Dex would head straight to his own bed. He follows suit and slides under the comforter in just his underwear. They lay facing each other, smiling softly, until Dex pulls Nursey in for another soft kiss. 

They stay like that, trading gentle kisses until they’re pulled into sleep.

*****

Nursey wakes slowly, with confusion. He can feel fingers laced through his and a warm hand tracing circles onto his hip. A smile is gracing his lips before he opens his eyes and puts a face to the warmth. Dex is lying in front of him looking gorgeous, and sated, and incredibly sad. Nursey’s smile is bittersweet as he lifts a hand to lay it on Dex’s cheek.

“Ending it before it begins?” he asks, tracing his thumb over the scar he found the previous night. He loves it, just like he does everything else that encompasses William Poindexter.

“God, Nursey, I like you so much. But I can’t do this. It’s risky and we barely get along, and if it falls apart, I won’t have anywhere to go. I can’t,” Dex whispers, tightening his fingers around Nursey’s like he’s afraid he’ll pull away, like he’s not the one leaving.

Nursey nods, thumb still tracing Dex’s cheek. He leans in and kisses Dex chastely. 

“I understand. No hard feelings, bro. I’m gonna go shower,” Nursey says, calm as anything.

And if he sobs in the bathtub under the pounding of the shower head, well, that’s no one’s business but his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hooooo boy, I'm so sorry, I know it's angsty. wow, I didn't even know this was gonna happen when I wrote it  
> I hope y'all still like this and aren't too mad at me since I promised some love literally two chapters ago lmao technically thats true? they loved on each other? right?  
> lmao anyway leave me a comment cause I'm fuuuuucking lonely, and feel free to come scream at me on [tumblr!](https://oluranurse.tumblr.com)


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nursey calls his dad, and he and Dex come to an understanding.

Getting closure fucking sucks.

Whoever said that closure was healthy was wrong, and an asshole, and Derek Nurse would like to find them and punch them in the dick.

He hooked up with Dex, and he loved it, and he loves him, and things were called off for an actual reason, and the worst part of it is that Nursey gets it. He completely understands where Dex is coming from and why he’s afraid to get into anything serious. He understands that Dex doesn’t feel comfortable enough with himself and his place on the team, that he’s afraid that if things go sour, he will lose his friends, and Nursey has never been one to ask someone to stay when they clearly don’t want to. So, yeah, he gets it.

It doesn’t stop it from hurting.

It’s been a little over a week since they’ve hooked up, and Nursey’s in the library, studying. It’s the only place he can get peace of mind these days, surrounded by his first love, in a place where mutual silence is the number one rule. He reads the next paragraph in his textbook and realizes that he’s already gone over it a few times, unable to process the sentences with everything going on in his head. He closes the book with a sigh and lays his head down on his arms on the table in front of him. His phone vibrates before he can truly get comfortable wallowing, and it’s a call from his mom.

He picks up immediately, glad he already had his headphones in, and packs his bag so that he can talk on the phone without disturbing the other library patrons.

“Hey, Ma,” Nursey answers, slipping into Spanish easily.

“Hi, B. Are you okay?” She asks, and he can hear the worry in her voice. 

It’s a little surprising because he hasn’t told anyone, not even his siblings, what happened with Dex. It makes sense though; Juli has always had a sixth sense for when something is wrong with her kids. She used to joke that she was sick all through his other sibling, Amina’s, childhood because she was so worrisome.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just studying,” he says as he pushes the door to the library open and starts to walk.

“Mmm,” she says, and Nursey knows she’s not going to let it go.

“Okay, I just finished studying, and now I’m going to my room.”

He heads for the nearest coffee shop and he feels the weight of his mom’s silence on the phone. He sighs.

“You ready to stop lying to your mom?” Juli says.

“Ugh, okay, fine. It’s just weird to talk to you about boy problems,” Nursey grumbles.

“Well, you don’t have to talk to me, mijo; it’s not good for you if it doesn’t make you feel better. Just talk to someone, me, your mom, your dad, Chelsea, your sisters. Talk to your friends. I know you’re hurting, I can feel it. I just want you to be okay.”

Nursey feels tears well up in his eyes and he blinks furiously to keep them from running down his face. “Okay. Okay. I think I’m gonna call Dad.”

“Okay, Baby. Whatever it is, it will be okay. We’re here for you if you need us,” Juli says sweetly and Nursey presses the heels of his hands to his eyes before the tears can fall.

“Thanks Ma, love you,” Nursey says.

“I love you too, so much. Call us soon, okay?” Juli says.

Nursey promises and hangs up, dialing his dad immediately before he can chicken out. He doesn’t have anywhere to go for peace, so he pulls his cap low over his eyes and keeps on his walk to the coffee shop. Hopefully he can get in and out before he blubbers to his dad. Malik picks up on the third ring.

“Hey! It’s my favorite boy!” Malik says, big and joyful.

“I’m your only boy,” Nursey says, smiling in spite of himself.

“Which means you’re also my least favorite, which means you gotta step it up, kid,” Malik quips, and Nursey laughs.

“I’ll work on that. What are you doing?”

“I am grading papers before I go out this evening with your moms.”

“All of them?”

“Yeah, all of them,” Malik laughs, and it’s warm like New York summers. “Chelsea found some play or something that she wants to go to and invited Juli and Aaliyah, so we are going to do that this evening. I’m glad, we could all use a pleasant night out.”

“Don’t try to play me Dad, I know you looked it up. What’s it about?” Nursey says, and he can hear his dad’s eye roll before he launches into a synopsis of the play. 

Malik likes to pretend he doesn’t care, but when his family is interested in something, he always does a little bit of research to learn about it too. It’s the English teacher in him, but it’s also the fact that Malik Nurse is a huge softie who likes to keep up with the interests of his loved ones. It’s Nursey’s favorite thing about him. 

He’s reached the coffeeshop by the time his dad is done giving a presentation on the play he hasn’t even seen yet, and Nursey shakes his head fondly.

“Sorry, Baby, I didn’t mean to get all Professor on you. What’s up with you?” Malik asks, just as Nursey makes it to the front counter. 

He tells his dad to give him a minute while he orders his drink. He smiles his thanks to the barista and apologizes to his dad once he gets his order.

“Mom texted you?” Nursey asks as he pushes the door open to exit the coffee shop.

“She did, but that doesn’t mean you have to tell me just because you told her you would,” Malik answers patiently.

“I hooked up with Dex,” Nursey blurts out.

“Your d-man?” Malik asks after a moment.

“The very same.”

“Okay. So is this a bad thing?” Malik asks.

“Yes,” Nursey answers, and pours his heart out as he heads back to the Haus. 

He spares him the dirty details, but tells him everything else. He knows he starts crying in the middle of it because his vision blurs, but he can barely feel it over the ache in his heart. It feels just as awful as it did the first day, his dad’s soft sounds of comfort easing it only a little. He tells him how long he’s been waiting for things to get where they finally made it, and how stupid he felt for giving in at the first indication that Dex was interested. Dex has yet to leave him alone, trying every day in different ways to get Nursey to interact with him, and Nursey tells his dad that’s the worst part, losing the dynamic they finally figured out together. He heaves a big breath when he’s done and wipes his eyes with his free hand.

“I don’t know, it just really fucking sucks,” Nursey says softly.

“I bet it does,” Malik says just as softly.

They’re silent for a moment, Malik thinking and Nursey trying not to. He listens to his dad’s gentle breathing as he walks.

“I don’t think there’s an easy answer, son. You’re going to have to wait it out. Time will make it hurt less, and time is the only thing that’s going to fix this weird place you found yourselves in. Try to move on. Let yourself notice and hang out with other people. You’ve been interested in this boy for so long that it seems like it’s even harder to figure out what to do now that you don’t know where you stand. So just. Let yourself have some fun outside of him, and don’t let him control how you feel about everything,” Malik says finally.

“That sounds easy enough,” Nursey says, and he can see the ramshackle form of the Haus looming in the distance. He hates that the anxiety associated with Dex is outweighing the feeling of home he usually gets when he sees the hockey frat.

“It won’t be easy. But you can do it. It will be okay,” Malik says.

Nursey thanks his dad and they exchange I love you’s just as Nursey reaches the door to the Haus. It’s quiet, but Nursey can feel the presence of various members throughout. He stops in the kitchen to trash his empty coffee cup before heading up to his room. He's secretly thankful that there was no one around that he had to speak to, and breathes a sigh of relief when he finds his room empty. He takes his hoodie off, puts his bag on the floor, and is bent over to take his shoes off when the door opens to the bathroom he shares with Chowder. Dex walks through; their eyes meet and Nursey misses him so fiercely he thinks he might drown in it. He stands abruptly and turns to the bedroom door, pulling it open.

“Nursey,” Dex says, grabbing Nursey’s arm before he can leave the room. 

Nursey can feel his whole body tense, and Dex must feel it too, because he immediately lets go. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-- I just want to talk to you. Please,” Dex says, hands up and voice soft.

Nursey sighs and closes their bedroom door, bracing his forehead against it for a second before turning around. He sees Dex wither a little under his gaze, putting his hands in his pockets and rocking back on his heels.

“Okay, Poindexter,” Nursey says, crossing his arms.

“Okay. Uh, how are you?” Dex starts with, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck.

Nursey just looks at him for a minute. “Shitty.”

“Okay, that’s fair.”

“Look, what are you wanting, Dex? I’ve been perfectly nice, I’ve stayed out of your way,” Nursey says, exasperated.

“I want things to go back to the way they were! I don’t want you out of my way, Nurse, you haven’t been out of my way in three fucking years. I want to understand,” Dex says, frustration raising the volume of his voice.

“The way things-- Dex, how could you expect me to just immediately be okay with things going back to the way they were?! We hooked up and you didn’t even give me a chance before you told me you didn’t want me!”

“But I told you where I was coming from, you said you understood,” Dex says, and he’s pacing now, running a hand through his hair. “I mean, I know it was shitty, but we just hooked up, and it was just one time, right? No time to even get attached.”

Nursey flinches.

“Maybe for you, but I’m attached, Dex. I’ve been attached,” Nursey says, voice hard. “I was attached before--- and then you came all over me and kissed me to sleep like I meant something, just to wake up the next morning to tell me it wasn’t worth it. And I get it, I really do, which is why I didn’t fight you on it. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt."

Dex looks at him, surprise etched in his features. If Nursey looked close enough, he would see how his hands are shaking. “What are you saying, that you love me or something?”

“Or something,” Nursey says, still angry.

“Shit,” Dex says, running a hand down his face. “Fuck. And then I cornered you in a room, and forced you to talk to me. I’m so sorry.”

He walks over to the desk in their room, pulling out the chair and sitting in it heavily. Nursey watches him, arms crossed like he can hold his emotions in as long as he doesn’t let go. He wishes he could look at Dex and feel nothing but he can’t, affection still swells up in his chest like a wave about to break. Except now, he knows it’s going to pull him under.

“Look, I know that I’m not what you want, and that’s fine. I don’t make a habit of convincing people to want me. But this isn’t as easy for me as it apparently is for you. I don’t know when things will be back to the way they were, if they ever will be,” Nursey says quietly, the anger melting out of him.

“Nursey. Derek. This isn’t easy. I don’t want you to think for a second that it was easy to let you go.”

Nursey just shrugs.

“Even as I was telling you that I couldn’t, I wanted to hold on. I want something with you,” Dex says leaning forward, desperate for Nursey to understand. “But it’s reckless. And I’m an asshole, and I know I would fuck everything up, and then what?”

“I’m not asking you to reconsider, I told you I get where you’re coming from and I meant it. I’m just asking for you to see where I’m coming from. I need time. Things are fucking weird now and I don’t know how to navigate it. I deserve the time to figure it out.”

Dex looks at him and blows out a breath. His hair is a mess from running his hands through it, and his cheeks are ruddy from emotion and Nursey hates himself for noticing every bit of it.

“I’m sorry. For cornering you, and for,” Dex pauses for a second, like he doesn’t want to say it. “For leading you on, I guess, and for hurting you. I didn’t know. I never would have if I had known, and I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Nursey turns on his heel and walks out of the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyy sooooo don't hate me! I promise a happy ending, but they gotta. get bad first and then it'll get better. anyway, Malik Nurse! I hope you love him, he's a good happy man. He's like. a giant teddy bear. he's a teacher and he's full of good advice and he loves his family very much.
> 
> I hope y'all are okay with me introducing so many OC's, but for what I'm going for with this fic, I needed Nursey to have a support system and the bros are good but. Not with this, ya know? so anyway. idk when the next update will be bc life is kicking my ass, but I'm working on it. thanks for reading, and enduring my rambling, and come visit me on Tumblr, or leave me a fuuuucking comment, you know the drill


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all so so much for being patient! life has been kicking my ass and then i when i got the writing bug back i just couldn't squeeze anything out for this. but i finally did and it's here!
> 
> i'm sorry that it's so short, but i hope you still enjoy!

Nursey has been taking his dad’s advice, and learning how to have fun outside of William Poindexter. He’s spent more time with his art friends and it made him realize how much he had been neglecting everyone in an effort to be in Dex’s orbit. He’s angry with himself about it, and sleeping under the guy every night just fuels his guilt fire even more. He throws himself into social situations that don’t involve Dex, and surprises himself when he actually starts to have fun. He didn’t realize how much his crush was weighing him down, how much it was hurting him. He’s spending more time with people who get him on a level Dex never really will, in situations Dex never really felt comfortable in.

It’s liberating, in a way, to see himself without the longing.

Only problem? Dex looking like a kicked puppy every time he sees him.

He would be lying if he said he didn’t feel some vindictive joy at seeing Dex hurting a little too, but he didn’t let it last very long. Dex did acknowledge how he was hurting Nursey, and has been giving him his space, and he’s gotten a lot of points in Nursey’s book for that.

To be honest, Nursey is getting kind of exhausted by avoiding Dex. Despite the fun of hanging out with other people, Dex is his best friend, and he misses having him around. He’s too proud to admit it, and has no idea how he should go about letting him know that things are okay. So he does nothing.

Weeks pass, and he still hasn’t done anything, except now, he’s avoiding the situation and he’s _pouting_  about it. He knows better than to pout to Ford, because her no nonsense way of thinking is not going to help him. He avoids pouting to Chowder too much, because he already gets it from Dex. Bitty does too, but pouting to Bitty usually results in a kick in the right direction with a side of pastries, and really, who could resist that?

That’s how Nursey finds himself in the kitchen on a Thursday afternoon, sitting at the kitchen table with a book while Bitty bakes something with far too many steps for Nursey to follow. They’re sitting in companionable silence, but Nursey knows he’s putting off melancholy vibes, as sure as he knows Bitty is ignoring them. He’s about to speak up when their companionable, deflecting silence is interrupted by Dex walking in the kitchen.

Bitty looks up with a smile, and Dex smiles back at him, careful not to look too long at Nursey.

“Hey, honey, you wanna help?” Bitty asks brightly, and Nursey isn’t fooled for one second. He knows Bitty would start Dex on stirring one thing or another and tell him he couldn’t stop, and then find some convenient excuse to leave them alone in the kitchen.

Dex must sense it too, because his eyes flicker to Nursey before he shakes his head. “Nah, I’ve got homework to do, I was just grabbing a water. Maybe next time?”

Bitty makes an agreeable noise, but his whipping gets a little more aggressive as Dex grabs what he needs before slipping silently out of the kitchen,

“Nursey, you have to talk to him,” Bitty says after Dex is out of earshot, whipping his cream into submission.

“Why do I have to talk to him? I moved back into the room. I’ve been nice. We play well at practice. What else is there?” Nursey says, taking the out for what it is, and pretending this is all more than he was already thinking about.

Bitty lifts up his whisk to see that his peaks are as stiff as he wants them, and sets down the bowl with a self satisfied nod. He wipes his hands on his apron before putting them on his hips.

“You’re goin’ to talk to him because if I have to wade through his mopiness that he pretends he isn’t feelin’ for one more second, I’m going to murder the both of you with my bare hands. Also, I’m your damn captain and I said so,” Bitty huffs.

Nursey pauses, then smirks. “You have BEAR hands?!”

“Derek Nurse, get out of my fuckin’ kitchen, I swear to God!” Bitty says, exasperated and fond, as he throws a hand towel.

Nursey laughs as he ducks out.

He’s still smiling as he makes his way up the stairs to his bedroom, and it slides gently off of his face when he gets to his closed door. He takes a deep breath and pushes it open. Dex is sitting at the desk with his headphones in, and he looks up when Nursey walks in, smiling like he forgot he isn’t supposed to. Nursey sighs and shuts their door, before motioning for Dex to take out his headphones. Dex looks surprised, then relieved, and Nursey only feels slightly guilty. He waits until Dex turns his music off.

“Okay,” he says simply.

“Okay?” Dex says.

“Okay, I’m not mad anymore. Okay, I miss being your friend. Okay, my feelings are still hurt but fuck it, life’s too short, and I’m tired of you being sad. I’m tired of me being sad. So. Okay,” Nursey says.

Dex looks at his face and Nursey tries to keep it as open as possible as he studies him right back. Dex must like what he sees, because he says:

“Okay.”

Dex looks at him at him some more, and Nursey lets him get his fill as he putters around the room and changes into more comfortable clothes. He doesnt look up until he’s settled on his bed with his laptop in his lap. Dex is still looking and Nursey meets his eye.

“What?” he asks.

“Just making sure you meant it. You have a habit of making yourself apologize before you’re ready,” Dex says .

Nursey startles. He doesn’t have to think very long to realize that Dex is right.  “I appreciate that, but I do mean it. I’m sure it won’t be easy, but whatever this is isn’t easy either. So, I’m good. Chill,” he says with a teasing smirk.

Dex rolls his eyes fondly and gets back to whatever he was doing, and Nursey slowly plugs his headphones in, if only to give himself something to do. He wants to be annoyed that Dex reads him so easily, but he’s mostly just a little bit in love with that fact. Except, no he’s not, because he’s trying to get over Dex.

He just wishes Dex didn’t make it so damn difficult.

Nursey and Dex work their way tentatively back into friendship, plodding gently around each other like they’re both afraid they’re going to make one wrong move and scare the other away. The bickering doesn’t come as freely as it used to, and the chirps are particularly harmless, but it’s progress. Chowder has voiced his relief, loudly and joyfully, on more than one occasion, and they both act sufficiently guilty about it. They’re far from the days of Frog Fridays and cuddle piles, but they’re better than they were.

Nursey’s going to try and make sure they keep getting better.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank for sticking with me, im already working on the next chapter so, there won't be as long of a wait next time around lmao
> 
> as always, leave me a fuuuuuuucking comment and come visit me on [tumblr!](https://oluranurse.tumblr.com)


	11. Chapter 11

The year passes them by in moments, some quick as a blink, some slow as molasses. Nursey and Dex figure out how they work together off the ice, while dominating on it, winning game after game under the tutelage of their fearless leader. It takes them a while, but they get back to hanging out after practice and studying together, making their way back to Frog Fridays and cuddle piles with Chowder, the realization that they only have one more year to do so looming over them. 

Nursey is getting better about accepting Dex’s role in his life. Their friendship is something he doesn’t want to lose, and he knows he deserves someone who will meet him where he is, someone willing to have a relationship with him without fear. He Tinders, he flirts, he sets up a couple dates that go nowhere in particular, but leave him feeling wanted, and satisfied. 

So when the team decides to put on a kegster of epic proportions to celebrate their killer winning streak, Nursey is all in.

He gets dolled up with Ford and glides in to the party with a smile, knowing the effect he has on everyone attending; he wasn’t voted Samwell’s Most Beautiful for no reason. He takes the drinks offered to him as he wades through the crowd, offering up greetings as he passes. He makes it to the back porch where they’re keeping the coolers and tub juice and finds Dex there, dipping his cup in.

“‘Sup Dex,” he says, grabbing a red solo cup and dipping it into the juice.

Dex looks him up and down when he thinks Nursey isn’t looking. “Hey. You, uh. You look good.”

Nursey’s grin is blinding. He tosses back his cup and scoops up another.

“Thanks, bro. I don’t know if I wanna pick up tonight, but I want to be able to, you know?”

Dex blinks at him. “Just let me know if you leave.”

Nursey salutes and sips at his cup with a wink before heading back inside. He’s stopped by a gorgeous girl from his creative writing group, who pours a shot and begs him to indulge. He does one with her and takes another with him for the road, when he sees Ian, someone from Tinder he was hoping to meet at the party, dancing hot and dirty with another guy.

Nursey downs the shot in his hand and sidles up to the couple, the alcohol loosening his muscles and his inhibitions. He dances between them, pressing himself against Ian. Hands slide warm and firm on his hips as he moves, the music pulsing under his skin with every vibration of the beat; it must be the guy Ian was dancing with. They move smoothly together, Nursey feeling the warm expanse of man with every roll of his hips.

He makes the mistake of looking up and catches Dex’s eye. He’s posted up against a wall nearby and  _ staring _ , his cheeks bright, and his eyes black, the whiskey brown Nursey loves so much eaten up by pupil. He’s chewing on his cup viciously, and Nursey grins, bright and hot, and a little mean.

He meant it when he said he wouldn’t try and convince Dex to want him back, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t show him what he’s missing.

He looks away and gives the couple he’s dancing with his attention. Ian turns to him and bats his eyelashes, staring at Nursey’s lips, and Nursey indulges him, kissing him deeply and drinking in the taste of party, a dizzying concoction of sweat, arousal, and alcohol. He can feel the hitch in Ian’s boyfriend’s breath (Anthony, Nursey remembers), and the bulge in his jeans as he presses more firmly against Nursey.

“You wanna get out of here?” he growls, and Nursey smiles. 

It feels good being wanted. When he looks up and immediately notices that Dex is gone, he knows that he’s going to say no. 

“You two are mad sweet, but I’m going to have to decline. Thanks for the dance,” he says, and turns from Ian to kiss Anthony. “And the kisses.”

Nursey could get their numbers, but he knows he wouldn’t call, so he beelines for the kitchen. He tells himself it’s just to get a water, though he knows full well that Dex is on self-imposed Nursey Patrol and won’t have traveled very far from him. His suspicions are confirmed when he sees Dex leaning against the counter, scowling at the floor like it killed his cat. 

He glances up when he hears Nursey come in, and quickly schools his features into something nicer.

“I hope you’re coming in here to get a water, Nurse,” he says.

Nursey pulls one out of the fridge and holds it up in response, moving to stand right in front of him. “You not dancing, Poindexter?”

“You know I’m not much of a dancer,” Dex says. “You looked like you were having fun, though.”

“I was, yeah,” Nursey says, and takes a huge gulp of his water. Dex watches his throat move. Nursey lets him look.

“You leaving with them?” Dex asks, with forced casualty.

“Do you get to ask me that?” Nursey says, just as casual.

The silence is thick somehow, despite the party going on around them, as they stare each other down. Nursey takes another drink and Dex looks away.

“No, I guess not,” Dex says. He sounds dejected, so Nursey takes pity on him.

“Wrong answer. You’re on Nursey Patrol, that’s the exact question you’re supposed to ask. Don’t go soft on me, now, Billiam.”

Nursey waves a hand as he walks back out of the kitchen and heads back to the party. He’s not too proud to admit that he’s still a little obsessed with having Dex nearby, but he’s still going to try and have a good time. He heads to the back porch to grab some more Tub Juice before dancing his way back onto the dance floor. He dances with more people than he has the capacity to remember, moves varying from jumping up and down to filthy grinds and everything in between.

He’s got another cup of juice in his hand and someone grinding dirty into his lap when Dex appears in front of him. Alcohol is clouding his brain too much to read his expression properly, but he has a feeling that Dex wants to go to bed. He pushes the person away from him with a thanks and kiss to the cheek and turns to Dex.

“Time to go, Dexy?” he says, slurring more than he thought he would.

“Yeah, time to go,” Dex says, holding out a water bottle for Nursey. He takes it obediently and slurps it down, only spilling a little down his front.

Nursey flings an arm around Dex’s shoulder and lets him lead the way to their room. With Dex sharing some of his weight, he’s able to get up the stairs without tripping and push open the door to their room. He collapses into his bed, already half asleep, and startles when Dex shakes his shoulder gently.

“Here, drink this,” Dex says, holding out another bottle. “And don’t gulp it, I don’t feel like cleaning up your puke tonight.”

Nursey sits up with an accommodating grunt, and sips at his water. He must have missed Dex bending down, because he’s surprised when he opens his eyes and Dex is kneeling, untying his shoe before pulling it off.

“What are you doing?” Nursey says, though he makes no move to stop him.

“If I let you go to bed with your shoes on, you’re going to be pissed in the morning,” Dex says. His tone is matter of fact, but his cheeks are blushing bright.

“Thank you,” Nursey says softly.

He climbs into bed when Dex is done and watches Dex take off his party clothes and climb into his own bed, mind more clear than when they arrived from the warmth from Dex’s fingers still lingering on his ankle. He doesn’t want to think too much into it, but his alcohol addled brain is determined to make his heart flutter. 

Dex  _ knows _ him, anticipates his needs and accommodates them before Nursey even realizes something is wrong, and god, he would be such a good boyfriend if he wasn’t so damn stubborn. He lays in silence, frustrated by the thoughts in his head preventing the vibrations of the speakers downstairs from lulling him to sleep like they usually do.

“Hey, Nursey?” Dex says.

“Mmm?”

He hears Dex take a deep breath before speaking.

“I’m sorry that I reacted the way I did when we hooked up. I’m sorry that I implied that it was just a fling. I’m sorry that I’ve been such a dick in so many ways, and that it’s taken me this long to actually say it out loud. But I was watching you dance and I realized that if I didn’t say something now, I was going to miss my chance.

“I know I barely even deserve to say your name, but I love you, Derek. I want to be with you. I’m willing to put in the work. I want to. I know you have no reason to give me a chance, or believe me, but I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make this work.”

Nursey lies there for a moment, his fingers laced together on his stomach. His heart is beating loud enough that he’s sure Dex can hear it over the pulsating music coming through the floor. He wants more than anything to say yes, and have him right here and now. But he’s drunk and Dex probably is too, and he has to know that this is real, that it isn’t the alcohol talking.

“I’m drunk,” he says finally. “Ask me again in the morning.”

He falls asleep to the sound of Dex’s slow breathing.

 

***************

 

Nursey wakes up feeling like a small man with a hammer is trying to beat his way out of his skull, and a bladder so full he thinks he may burst. He stands gingerly and waddles his way to the bathroom, groaning the whole time. The door is unlocked, the shower is running, but Nursey is in too much discomfort to care that it’s occupied. He gets to the toilet and releases with another pitiful groan, the tension leaving his body slowly. The steam is clearing his head a little and he vows to get some water and some food into his system as soon as possible.

He pulls his pants up and puts the toilet seat down before turning to the shower.

“C?” he says.

“Nah,” Farmer says from the other side of the shower curtain. “Chris is still in the bed.”

“Oh, okay. Sorry for barging in on you. I didn’t flush so I wouldn’t burn you to death,” he says, washing his hands quickly in the sink.

“Oh, no problem, it’s not like we haven’t peed together before,” she laughs. “Go eat something, you sound like you feel like shit.”

“Aye, aye,” he says back, saluting, even though she can’t see him.

He heads for the door and pauses. “Hey actually, when you’re done, will you come to my room? I’d like your opinion on something.”

“Yeah, sure,” she says brightly.

Nursey closes the door behind him and notices the Gatorade and Aleve sitting on his bedside table. It’s Blue Cherry, his favorite, and there’s a little note under it that says “for your hangover” in Dex’s handwriting. He smiles a little and tosses back a couple of them, chasing it with a swig of the Gatorade. He’s still studying the note when Farmer steps into the room, using a t shirt to dry her long hair. She has a brush, comb, and rubber bands in one hand and a smile on her face.

“Feel too bad to braid while you talk?” she says, handing him the materials, and grabbing a pillow to shove under her butt while she sits on the floor.

“Nah, ‘s chill,” he says, running his fingers through her hair to detangle it a little. 

He completely detangles her hair with the comb before running the brush through it and parting it.

“So Dex asked me out last night,” he says. “We were drunk, and I don’t know if he meant it but-- he asked.”

“Yeah?” Farmer says, and she doesn’t sound as surprised as he thought she would.

“Yeah,” Nursey says.

Her hair glides like water through his fingers as he winds the three pieces, over and under into a french braid. He pulls hair from the side of her hair and makes the braid tight the way he knows she prefers, speaking again after he gets a good rhythm going.

“What do you think I should do?” He asks, smoothing his fingers down a piece of hair in his left hand as he holds the other pieces between the fingers of his right.

“I think you should go for it, Der. You haven’t really talked much about it since y’all hooked up, but I know you still want him. You’ve been holding a candle for him since we were freshman. I think if you don’t, it’ll be because you’re still trying to punish him, or yourself, and that’s not fair to either of you.”

Derek ties off the end of her hair with a rubber band and pats her shoulder to let her know he’s done. She turns to face him from her position on the floor and he rubs a hand over his face to escape her scrutiny. He’s thankful when she only sighs and pats his knee.

“Tell him yes, Nursey. Give him a chance. Worst case scenario, it doesn’t work out and you can move on knowing you tried.”

Nursey nods and gives her a grimace that he tries to pass off as a smile. She uses the edge of the bed to haul herself off the floor and takes her hair materials before heading to the bathroom to check out her hair. 

She yells a thank you to Nursey when she checks it out, closing the door softly to Chowder’s room to leave Nursey to his thoughts. He’s still trying to figure out what to do when his stomach growls out a reminder for him to eat. He gets up and changes out of his gross party clothes from previous night before he heads to the kitchen.

The Haus looks relatively clean, so Chowder must have made the Tadpoles and Spawn clean up before going to bed, and he smiles at the thought. Now that he’s downstairs, Nursey notices the smell of breakfast food cooking and prepares to thank Bitty profusely, when he sees a mess of red hair at the stove instead of blonde. Dex is arranging a tray of cinnamon rolls for the oven as bacon cooks away at the stove in two pans: one for pork bacon and one for turkey. 

It makes Nursey’s heart clench that Dex remembers that he doesn’t eat pork, and that his favorite Gatorade is Blue Cherry, and his feet are moving him forward before he has a say.

He plasters himself against Dex’s back and feels him startle before relaxing.

“Just getting up?” he asks, still arranging an ungodly amount of cinnamon rolls onto cookie sheets.

“You made me turkey bacon,” Nursey mumbles.

“You don’t eat pork,” Dex says, confused. “Of course I made you turkey bacon.”

“Ask me again,” Nursey says. 

Dex pushes Nursey off gently with a shrug of his shoulders, and turns around to face him, eyes brimming with hope.

“You serious?” he asks. Nursey nods.

“Ask me again.”

Dex is blushing bright enough to light up a room, but he grins and grabs Nursey’s hand despite his embarrassment.

“Derek Nurse. I would like to go out with you. Will you go out with me?”

“Anytime, Poindexter,” Nursey says, and his smile is soft, and full of promise.

Dex nods, a smile on his face that Nursey knows is only for him. He leans forward and nuzzles his nose against Nursey’s, breathing him in. He kisses him, soft and fleeting on the corner of his mouth, and turns back to the stove.

“Get out of my way, Nurse. I have to finish making breakfast.”

Nursey obeys, and plops down at the table, pulling his phone out of his pocket. He shoots off a text to Farmer, a simple thumbs up emoji and settles at the table to watch Dex work.

Now that he’s allowed to look, he doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW.
> 
> my little spite fic about how Dex was an asshole, turned into this monster full of personal growth, oc's, and new relationships. I love my Dex and who he turned out to be, and i love who they're growing into together. i didn't expect this to be a 20k monster (the longest thing i've ever written!!!), but i love it, and i hope you all do too.
> 
> Just a reminder: the title of this story is from TOO GOOD by Troye Sivan, go give that a listen and tell me it doesnt match their hook up scene, i dare you
> 
> special thanks to Nan, Hez, Peebs, Dizzy and the group chat, i wouldn't have been able to finish this without y'all!
> 
> come yell at me on [toombler](https://oluranurse.tumblr.com) and be sure to leave me a comment and tell me all of your feelings!


End file.
